Tag: What’s for Supper?

What’s for supper? Vol. 416: San Salami

Happy Friday! I went HOMEMAKER BERSERK this week. I know it’s Lent, but I can’t help it. It’s spring, there are a ton of feast days and birthdays, and I’m just being muscled around helplessly by the general optimism in the air like a mouse by a cat. Look, if you didn’t like that sentence, you can have your money back.

Last Friday I collected the last of the sap from the maple trees, tromped around in our tiny woods and collected a ton of dead branches, and started boiling sap. 

And I do mean started. I was using Damien’s little wood stove that he used to have in his “office” (a converted ice fishing shack), and I guess it would work to heat up a small, enclosed space, but it did not do a great job boiling sap.

I sat out there for over three hours feeding dry wood into the stove, and I never got the sap to boil. (I know it has a large surface area, which makes it slower to boil, but that’s the point: You’re trying to evaporate as much as possible, so that’s why it’s in a pan instead of a pot! I did cover it until it started to steam.)

It was pretty nice out there, anyway, but I was a little disappointed. I packed the remaining sap into some snow and put the batch I had heated into the fridge. 

SATURDAY
Leftovers?

Saturday Damien and the girls were still in NYC, so I was pretty busy doing chores. I actually went a little crazy (by which I mean I attempted to reach levels of cleanliness that other people consider a baseline) and took apart the recycling bins and scrubbed them out, scrubbed the wall and floor in the kitchen where they sit, and also took two large baskets of rusty ice skates to the dump. I had put them on the side of the road in the fall when we tore down the porch, but astonishingly, nobody wanted two large baskets of rusty ice skates, and while I was working on admitting this to myself, it snowed and kept on snowing, soooo they’ve been frozen in place until this past week. Phew, that felt good. 

On Saturday the door to the duck house fell off. We knew it was going to happen eventually, so that was a bit of a relief, too. But I forgot to buy bigger hinges, so we had to just sort of barricade the door back on in the evening

creating the impression that we are terrified of ducks. Which is not completely off base. 

SUNDAY
Chicken Caesar salad

Sunday after Mass, I took Benny and Corrie to the second largest St. Patrick’s Day parade in the state, which was, well, it’s a small state. It was a cute parade, and it even stopped raining for most of it. 

Then I made my second attempt to boil sap, this time on the propane fire pit on the patio. This was equally unsuccessful, and then I ran out of propane anyway, and it started raining again, so I put the sap back in the fridge again, and worried about the outdoor sap buckets because it was getting pretty warm and some of the sap was getting pretty old. 

However, we got an egg! Our first duck egg of the year. They started laying MUCH sooner last year, but who knows why a duck does what she does. Definitely not the ducks.

First egg was a doozy:

It was a double-yolker, and I used it to make caesar salad dressing.

Jump to Recipe

I roasted some chicken breast and grated some parmesan cheese, and made a bunch of croutons with stale bread cubes toasted with melted butter, garlic powder, onion powder, salt, and pepper. 

A fine meal. That dressing will wake you up!

MONDAY
St. Patrick’s Day and Syrup Day!

Monday was actual St. Patrick’s Day. We decided to do corned beef, cabbage, carrots, and potatoes this year, rather than the full breakfast for dinner we do sometimes. This meal is more Irish American than Irish Irish, but so is St. Patrick’s Day, so there you go. (Apparently in Ireland, it was common to have cabbage with bacon, and the corned beef was for export, I think? But when they came to America, the Jews had lots of tasty corned beef brisket for cheap, so they went with it. Likely the Irish immigrants were eating imported Irish beef. 

I, for my part, decided to do this:

This is me wanting desperately to boil my sap, but also not wanting my newly-scrubbed kitchen to get all sappy. People will fight me and say that it’s not sap that condenses on the walls and runs down in light brown rivulets; what’s in the air is water vapor, and what I’m seeing is rivulets of my own kitchen filth. And they’re probably right! but either way, I didn’t want to see it; so I put up plastic and set a fan in front of the window and got to berlin’.

Actually first I strained the sap through some cheesecloth, to get the bugs and scraps of bark and whatnot out. Here you can see how clear the fresh sap is. It looks just like water.

And here is the bucket I was worried about:

If you are serious about syrup, you will not boil old, cloudy sap. It’s not dangerous (although the cloudiness is caused by bacteria); it’s just not gonna taste right. Some people will mix a little old sap in with new sap, and that masks the flavor. I decided to hang onto it and boil it separately, to see what happened. 

So here is the good, clear sap, after about eight hours of boiling. You just boil and boil and boil it, and keep adding more sap in as it evaporates and makes space:

Here is the finished syrup:

Lovely and absolutely delicious. It thickened up as it cooled. The dark spots are just coagulated syrup, which serious people strain out, but I do not. 

Then I boiled the bad sap up (I only had about five gallons, so it only took about three hours), and it did thicken up and get sweet, but has a faint, I don’t know, library paste taste to it? I am going to use it to make sticky maple walnut buns, I think. 

I didn’t get a good pic of the final syrup, because it was dark out by that time. But I decanted it into six jars, four for the older kids, one for us, and one for Millie, about four ounces each; and then about six ounces of second-rate syrup in a big jar. It needs to be refrigerated, because I didn’t do the whole sterile canning process. 

SATISFYING. So satisfying, altogether. I frickin did it. From tree to jug to bucket to pan to jar. I will probably make waffles this weekend for the nice syrup. Or, it’s, sigh, supposed to snow today and tomorrow, so maybe we will do sugar on snow. 

ANYWAY, I eventually got around to making dinner, and didn’t want to give up the stove space, so I made it in the oven. I just hunked the meat, five pounds of red potatoes, three pounds of carrots, and one cabbage in wedges, into a giant pan with some water, covered it loosely with foil, and cooked it at like 400 for about an hour and a half, which is not long enough, but corned beef is corned beef. 

There is plenty of leftover meat, so I will probably make Reubens this weekend.

TUESDAY
Chicken spinach quesadillas, chips and salsa

On Tuesday, I decided to prep Wednesday’s dessert. Wednesday was St. Joseph’s Day, and St. Joseph is our family’s patron, and I love him, and wish to cook and bake for him (us).

I decided to try a new-to-me recipe for Zeppole di San Giuseppe from Sip and Feast, a site which has given me so many great recipes. I remember the first time I made a choux pastry (this is before I ever saw The Great British Baking Show), and I was sure I had messed it up, because it’s so rubbery. 

But that’s how it’s supposed to look! I’m very glad to know you can make this ahead of time. I put it in a ziplock bag and tossed it in the fridge. 

Then I made the vanilla custard, and I used duck eggs, which are so rich and bright. 

Covered and refirgerated that, too. Duck eggs are big, and the yolks are proportionally bigger compared to the whites, so you can easily use two ducks for three large chicken eggs. 

Zeppole, if you are wondering too, is probably ultimately from the Latin “zippulae,” a little treat. There is a legend that, in Egypt, Joseph supported the family by selling nice little pancakes. There’s also a theory that “zeppole” comes from “zeppa,” meaning “stump,” or wedge of wood, and Joseph, carpenter, I dunno. Or possibly from “serpula,” like a coiled snake, and you make these pastries in a coiled pattern. I actually kind of love how etymology is often just a bunch of educated guesses, because people are weird and go wandering around the world making pancakes as they go, and talking about it to people who may or may not speak the same language. 

We were having chicken quesadillas for supper, and I made the chicken thighs in the Instant Pot. Just threw them in with some water and pressed the “poultry” button. When the meat was cooked, I drained and shredded it and added cumin, paprika, chili powder, and salt. 

I had my quesadilla with chicken, cheddar, and spinach. 

You can see how I was rushing – the cheese is barely melted! But I was starving, so they tasted great. Do you know, I had my first quesadilla when I was over twenty years old. I remember saying, “What’s THAT?” in a loud, obnoxious voice. It was guacamole, and I thought it looked horrible.  I hate to think what would have happened if I had been hanging around Abu Simbel and this bearded guy with a cute baby tried to sell me some pancakes. I would have been so rude. 

WEDNESDAY
St. Joseph’s Day!

The feast day began with three dentist appointments. We have been going to this dentist for something like eighteen years and I love her to pieces. I think it’s so smart to put a fun-house mirror in the waiting room. The kids find it very entertaining, but nobody has to touch it with their grubby hands. 

When we got back, Benny and Corrie helped me pipe the zeppole. 

The recipe says: “Pipe 3-inch circles in two layers, starting from the inside on the first layer. Leave a hole in the top of the second layer for the pastry cream. Make sure to leave at least 3 inches of room between each because they will expand during baking.” We made ours a little too small, but that just meant slightly daintier zeppole, and more of them!

While the zeppole were baking, the kids went to play outside WITHOUT JACKETS, because it is SPRING, and I got out the cheese-making kit Lena gave me for Christmas. 

I was a little nervous about the milk. It doesn’t have to be fancy organic milk or anything, but it’s not supposed to be ultrapasteurized, which is when they bring the milk to a higher temp than just for pasteurizing. I had one gallon of Aldi whole milk and one of Hannaford, and they just said “pasteurized.” They both turned out to be fine. 

And cheese-making turns out to be easy! There are a lot of steps, but nothing difficult. You just need to pay attention with the timer and the thermometer. Basically you heat up some milk, add some rennet (a tablet dissolved in water) and some citric acid at some point, I forget when; heat it up some more, and then let it sit. While it’s sitting, it magically separates into curds and whey!

Then you cut up the curds  

and slowly stir it while heating it again. 

drain the whey off

and heat and drain the curds it a few more times. I did it in the microwave, but you can also use a water bath. 

And then YOU HAVE CHEESE. You’re supposed to add salt and then stretch it like taffy and then shape it and put it in cold water, but I got confused and put it in cold water before I shaped it, so the first batch was shaped, uh, like this:

But very clearly cheese! Magic!!!!

Meantime, the first batch of zeppole came out of the oven and I was DELIGHTED with the results. So light and puffy! 

and they left these cute little rosettes on the parchment paper. 
 

I made a second batch (bigger ones this time) and put them in the oven, and then started a second batch of cheese. This one turned out prettier!

I think I needed to be a little faster stretching it, to get those little bumps out, but I was still delighted with the results. 

Benny and Corrie made some antipasto platters, and I showed them how to make salami roses. You just fold the slices of salami over a narrow-mouthed drinking glass, overlapping the slices, and then gently upend the glass and slide the salami rose off. 

If we have another baby, I shall name her Salami Rose. 

Didn’t they do a lovely job with the platters? Benny did the green ones and Corrie did the red. 

Damien, meanwhile, made probably the best sauce I have ever had. And I lived in Rome for three months. I truly cannot tell you how savory and delicious it was, and I’m very sad I didn’t get good pictures. He also made some tremendous meatballs, using this recipe, and sausage, and we had that with spaghetti. 

Dang, it was so good. A sauce to savor. Meatballs to remember. A dinner to dwell on. 

Lena and Moe came over for supper, which was super fun! Those big kids are turning out so great.

After we ate, I filled the zeppole with the cream filling, dusted them with powdered sugar, and topped them with fancy cocktail cherries, which were dark red and had a somewhat sour taste, very nice. 

I was pretty proud of these. 

For comparison, here is my first attempt at zeppole, a few years ago:

 Getting a star tip for piping sure makes a difference. And the Sip and Feast recipe is vastly superior to whatever I did the first time. I think those ones were also filled with instant vanilla pudding. But you know what, I remember being way to busy and tired to make zeppole, and I did it anyway. Yay past me! Yay present me! (Future me is on her own, though.)

I had some leftover pastry dough, so I piped this rather silly St. Joseph logo

and dusted that with powdered sugar, and we ate that, too! Buona festa! It was all great, all of it. Oh, I also made five loaves of garlic bread, because we are not savages. 

THURSDAY
Hot dogs and chips

Because Mama needs a break.

I actually love hot dogs. Mustard and sauerkraut, mmm. 

FRIDAY
Pizza

I’m a little torn with the pizza, because we have lots of yummy things in the fridge left over from St. J day — marinated peppers, artichoke hearts, fancy olives, nice parmesan, not to mention that wonderful mozzarella. Obviously I won’t be putting meat on, but I’m conflicted about the rest of it, because despite appearances, it is a Friday in Lent. 

Oh, but that reminds me, I didn’t tell you how the mozzarella tastes! It tastes great! Fresh and flavorful and creamy and light. You can make it firmer or softer, and you can skip the salt, and you can add all kinds of things to it (basil, prosciutto, etc.) when you’re shaping it, and make a log, or little pearls, or even cheese sticks. I’m so delighted with this kit. It comes with five or six rennet tabs, and you only use a quarter of one per gallon of milk. A gallon of milk makes, well, I forgot to weigh it, but it looked like over a pound of cheese to me. Anyway I see soooo much cheese in my future. The whole thing took like half an hour to make, and it was easy and entertaining. You can also make ricotta with this kit, which I haven’t tried yet. 

And that’s-a my story. Oh, except also I just ordered sighhhhh an incubator, because a certain child once missed seeing an egg hatch at school because of Covid a few years ago, and this has been an enduring and understandable sorrow, so Promises Were Made. I think if we do manage to hatch out some ducklings, we’ll have to name at last one of them Salami Rose. The rest can all be Joe.

Print

caesar salad dressing

Ingredients

  • 1 cup vegetable oil
  • 6 cloves garlic, minced
  • 12 anchovy fillets, chopped
  • 1 Tbsp kosher salt
  • 1/2 cup fresh lemon juice (about two large lemons' worth)
  • 1 Tbsp mustard
  • 4 raw egg yolks, beaten
  • 3/4 cup finely grated parmesan

Instructions

  1. Just mix it all together, you coward.

What’s for supper? Vol. 414: EVIL Friday to you

A few years ago during Advent, I found this in among Corrie’s papers:

And ever since then, every time I feel like I’m not quite hitting the right tone for some particular occasion, I think to myself, “Ah, evil feliz navidad.”

So, evil Lent to you! Or, wait, Evil Cuaresma! Here, on this, the very first Friday of Lent, is an illustrated list of all the food we ate, including Fat Monday, Fat Tuesday, and honestly Fat Thursday, including some incredibly juicy and delicious steaks! YEAH, THAT’S RIGHT. EVIL CUARESMA! 

SATURDAY
Leftovers with corn dogs and bulgoki empanadas

On Saturday, the kids were helping one of their siblings move, so I had no shopping buddy, which meant that EYE got to pick out the dessert, the weekend “silly cereal,” and the frozen food accompaniment for the leftover buffet. For dessert, I picked something called Lepre-cones

just strictly for the name. I myself would not try to market a quiescently frozen treat with “LEPRE” in the title, but that’s just me. My father used to sing a song about leprosy, with the line “there goes my eyeball, into your highball,” but that is all I can remember, and it seems like enough. 

To go along with the leftovers, I picked corn dogs, which most of the kids don’t like, but which Damien and I do; and something called “bulgogi empanadas,” which sounds like something I would make. So I had those two things for supper, plus some leftover rice, because it was Saturday and there are no vegetables allowed. 

The bulgogi empanadas tasted like school cafeteria beef stew stuffed into empanadas. Very sad. The corn dogs were great, though, because corn dogs are great. 

SUNDAY
Oddly sweet pizza

Sunday after Mass, for the last day of February vacation, we drove to Salem, MA to the Peabody Essex Museum, mainly to see the Flemish Masterworks exhibit. It was FANTASTIC. Lots of variety, nicely organized into sacred art, portraits, silly stuff, and landscapes, including sculpture, which I don’t usually associate with Flemish art. I just about passed out looking at a Rubens shoulder up close. Here’s some things that caught my eye. 

 

The rest of the museum was weird but good. They have a very wide variety of art, and they tend not to organize it by date, which is a little disorienting, but thought-provoking. Their art cards were not great, and I really wished for more information sometimes, but they weren’t too editorial, anyway. It is an extremely confusing building with not enough signs, and I spent about a third of my time lost, but I did keep accidentally wandering into interesting rooms, including lots of unexpected animals. Overall highly recommended – the museum, and especially this exhibit. It will be at PEM through May 4 and is traveling around the country. 

The Museum is in Salem, MA, which is THE Salem, of witch trial fame, and long ago, they decided that they were going to squeeze every drop out of that history in the tackiest way possible, which you have to admire. I mean it has all the gorgeous hand-carved colonial architecture and preserved cobblestone and quirky bay windows and whatnot, but also every last damn thing has a witch on it. Right next to the museum was the Witch City Mall, and we briefly considered getting pizza at the pizza place that was (witchily?) decorated with skeletons and a giant Frankenstein head, but it had such a heavy feeling of apathy and ennui, even for a mall, that we decided to look elsewhere. Those who are familiar with the Witch City Mall can tell me if we missed out on anything!

We ended up going to some pizza place in nearby Beverly, which serves NY style pizza. I think it was Siciliano Pizza or something along those lines. Anyway, we don’t get NY style pizza too often, and the kids were rather shocked by the thin crust and extremely sweet sauce. Is that typical? I was expecting the thin, crisp crust, but the sauce was SO sweet. 

We got one plain, one pepperoni, and one with tomatoes, feta, and spinach. The feta was also very sweet!

However, we were all Museum Hungry, so it was fine. Got home and collapsed, broccoli-fashion. 

MONDAY
Steak, mashed potatoes, green beans amondine

Back to school! And Damien reminded me that the heating element in the oven, which we replaced kind of a short time ago, broke again; so my plans to roast the giant eye of round roast beef I splurged on were foiled. (I asked about it on Facebook, but accidentally called it a rib eye, which is too splurgy for me, even for Fat Monday!)

ANYWAY, the upshot was that Damien just cut it into steaks and pan-fried it, and it was INSANELY DELICIOUS. 

Everybody got their own thick little juicy little half-pound steak, and I also made mashed potatoes and green beans amondine. I basically followed this recipe, which has you boil and blanch the string beans, and then in a pan, you melt a bunch of butter with thyme, garlic salt, and dijon mustard. I didn’t have dijon mustard, but I did have some of that stone ground whole mustard with the little popping seeds in it, and it was great. You add the string beans back into the butter and heat them up along with toasted slivered almonds (reminder that you can easily toast almonds in the microwave!) and a little more thyme. Yum. 

I really messed up the mashed potatoes, though. I just didn’t boil them long enough, but didn’t realize it until I had already drained the water out. So I tried to make up for their undercookedness by running them through the food processor; and when that didn’t go so great, I moved them to the Ninja blender and whipped the hell out of them. They did end up more or less smooth, but there was definitely Something Wrong with the texture. Oh well!

FAT TUESDAY
Dinner at the Winchester

Tuesday was Mardi Gras, and we have somehow established the tradition of going to Chili’s for Mardi Gras, so that’s what we did. I had some kind of chicken rice bowl thing and just about everyone else had some form of bacon burger and fries; and then we decided to do a “choose your own ice cream” adventure at Price Chopper. 

I picked Dulce de Leche Churro ice cream

and it was amaaaaaazing. 

WEDNESDAY
Spaghetti

Wednesday of course was Ash Wednesday, and also a dentist appointment, and also time for certain people to freak out in for no apparent reason in a pretty spectacular fashion. Then we went home, had spaghetti, and remembered we were dust. 

THURSDAY
Chicken burgers, chips, vegetables and dip; birthday cake

Thursday was Elijah’s birthday, and he graciously postponed his birthday meal (which will be Damien’s special elaborate lasagna) until the weekend, but he and Sophia did make a cake. 

Twenty-one candles, count ’em. My stars. Between that and the thing at the dentist where we went to schedule Lucy’s next six-month check up and discovered that, in six months, she will be too old to see the pediatric dentist anymore, is. . . quite a thing. Last I checked, all my kids were either four, or nine, or possibly 11. But not older than that! (The other week, when Corrie turned ten, I said, “Wow, you’re a whole decade old!” and she said, “That sounds so old! Probably because ‘decade’ sounds like ‘decayed.'” So you can see she’s inherited my cheery outlook on life.) 

On Thursday I also had my very first stress test, just to rule out cardiac issues since my body is still being kind of a weird guy. My heart looks great, and the visit notes said I was in good shape for my age, which, I’ll take it.

But I was chatting with the nurses as I was on the treadmill, and of course we got to talking about kids, and I mentioned (and simultaneously realized) that I have four teenage daughters. And that was also pretty good to hear (even from my own lips) because I’ve been going around feeling like such an absolute LOSER lately, and I didn’t really know why. But that explains it! I have an acute case of teenage daughters. Who are delightful and beautiful, funny and smart and helpful, interesting and creative, but . . . it would be developmentally inappropriate for them to spend a lot of time thinking about whether they are constantly making their mom feel like crap, and I am happy to report that they do not do this! So we’ve got that going for us. Anyway, my heart is fine. I chased each kid down and hugged them individually the other day. That’ll show ’em. 

And soon it will be spring, for real. We’ve had quite a bit of thawing here, so the morning drive is full of brilliant fog banks as the snowbanks evaporate, and what’s left is a grimy, tired snow without much fight left in it. Most likely it will snow again, but it really is truly actually kind of almost spring, finally, almost.

I tapped my maple trees on Tuesday, with only the finest, most high-tech equipment

and they’re actually running really slow, for some reason. Some of them are not running at all, and I have no idea why. I tapped above a root, on the south side, with a slight upward angle, when the nights are cold and the days are warm. Nothin’. But I am getting some sap from a few trees, and I’ll boil what I get, and that will be that. Maybe next week will be better. Maybe they’re taking a gap year. A sap gap. I don’t know. 

FRIDAY
Grilled cheese, tomato soup

And I am super duper looking forward to it. I love grilled cheese and tomato soup. Also I have been using My Fitness Pal to track calories for just over a month now, and let me tell you, something has happened to food in general in that time, because it tastes amazing.

I have tracked calories before, but not using an app, and for some reason, the little ring that shows how many calories I have left in the day is very motivating. Check back in six months and I’m sure I’ll be writing another affirming essay about how good it is to learn to be comfortable in a large body, rather than worrying about calories all the time. You know, I’m fairly full of sap myself. 

What’s for supper? Vol. 413: Erasmus B. Dragon

Happy Friday! Sorry for the interruption with the website last week, and thanks a lot, OBAMA. 

We have been on February vacation all week, and there has not been one single day when I’ve been sure what day it is, except I knew for sure that the month was almost over and I had cleverly arranged for all my writing deadlines to cluster together in one giant, unfortunate . . . cluster.

But, food! I’ll just do a few quick highlights from the previous week, because I tried a few new recipes. 

One day we had
Bacon potato soup and french bread.

The french bread is, of course, not a new recipe

Jump to Recipe

but I got cute and made sixteen little personal loaves, rather than four big ones. 

Because it’s such a simple recipe, I ventured outside my comfort zone and just added flour until the dough looked right, rather than meticulously measuring it. I’m trying to give myself credit for knowing how to do things I’ve done a thousand times before.

Turned out great! At least with bread.  

The soup was more or less following this recipe from Sugar Spun Run, and maybe it’s the My Fitness Pal talking, but I had a really hard time feeling like a recipe that includes bacon, all the bacon grease, milk, heavy cream, sour cream, butter, AND CHEESE (and additional cheese, bacon, and sour cream for the top!!!!!) really truly needed as much butter as this recipe called for. So I used a little less butter. I turn sideways, people question where I went. 

It’s one of those soups where you cook it for a while, then put half of it in a blender and puree it, and then add that back into the soup. I’ve only recently become familiar with this technique of soup made out of itself, and it’s pretty good. Quite a rich, thick soup. 

I did add a bit of cheese to the top, along with a little chili powder and chopped scallions, but mostly to add color, since it was quite beige.

I’m not gonna lie, this is a ridiculously delicious soup. The kids did NOT like it, though. They really resent when I serve bacon in any other form besides, you know, baconform. Which I understand! But also, sometimes I want to make things that I like.

We also had, let’s see, meatball subs, tacos, cuban sandwiches with beans and rice, and another new recipe: Ginger chicken from a site I haven’t used before, The Woks of Life. He gives very specific instructions for each ingredient, and it was pretty easy to follow, although I fudged a few things (mirin instead of Shaoxing wine, one kind of soy sauce instead of two, and onions instead of shallots), and my sauce didn’t come out as dark as his. Most likely I rushed it, which is the story of my life. 

But YOU GUYS, it was still SO GOOD. 

Tons of flavor, tender and gingery, wonderful comfort food. I think just about everybody liked it, which almost never happens. Corrie even requested it for her birthday meal (although she later recanted that in favor of . . . well, you’ll see). 

I also made some quick sesame broccoli, which is just broccoli sprinkled with sesame oil, soy sauce, salt, pepper, ground ginger and garlic, and sesame seeds, and then roasted. Very easy and popular. 

We spent part of the week getting ready for Corrie’s party (I have now decluttered every single room downstairs, and one room upstairs!). I made a paper mache pinata in the shape of a dragon egg (which, if you’re not familiar, is the same shape as a balloon) and some kind of half-hearted decorations (a “mystical cave entrance” in the living room doorway largely made of brown shipping paper twisted into vines and tacked onto the wall, with some green and purple foil easter grass thrown in).

The big thing was the DRAGON CAKE. I’m proud of this one. 

First I baked the cake layers. I almost always use box cake mix for younger kids’ birthdays, because they care a lot more about the look of the cake than the flavor, and their parties include so much candy and snacking that, by the time we get to cake, no one’s palate is especially fine tuned. 

So then I made a batch of rice krispie treats, and smooshed it together as compactly as I could, and formed it into a dragon-ish shape. I was very proud of remembering to form it on top of the pan I had baked the top tier of the cake in, so I knew it would fit onto the finished cake. 

It would have been smart to put a layer of parchment paper under it to keep it from sticking, but I didn’t think of that! It did stick a bit, but not disastrously. 

I made the dragon on Thursday for a party on Saturday, so it would have plenty of time to dry and get stiff. I also put a cup under his chin to prop it up while it dried, because it was droopy.

On Friday, I attached edible gold foil to the belly, chest, nose horn, and tip of the tail with frosting, and then I used hardening cookie frosting (comes in a pouch at Walmart) to attach a row of spikes from the top of his head to the end of his tail. The spikes are black candy melts cut into triangles. I made a feeble attempt to put them on in size order, but mostly just shoved them in there.

Then I made the wings! I had the bright idea to use fruit rolls. I cut up some plastic straws, laid them out, stretched the fruit rolls over one side and then flipped them over and stretched another layer on the other side, and trimmed each wing into scallops; and then I used a kitchen torch to seal the edges up so they wouldn’t come apart.

I put a wooden skewer inside the long straw, to make it more rigid, and to make it easier to anchor in the dragon’s body. These also got laid out overnight to stiffen and dry out, so they wouldn’t droop. 

I tried several different ways of covering the dragon’s body, with frosting, scales, etc., and finally reluctantly settled on fondant, which I haven’t used much before. This was nerve-wracking, because at first it looked like he was just wearing a big red sweater.

and truly, I say unto you, it took KIND OF A WHILE to get him all covered and smoothed. But I kept going, and when I molded it a bit and added claws and some details with black icing, it looked okay!

I iced the cake with black and grey frosting, carefully set the dragon on top, and added more gold foil, gold coins, and gold chocolate eggs, and also a bunch of vanilla Oreo cookies that I had sprayed with gold spray.

AND HERE HE IS.

Five guests were able to make it, the pinata worked perfectly (didn’t fall apart too soon, but wasn’t completely impenetrable) and she had a wonderful time. 

Phew! We had Walmart pizza for supper and then collapsed like bunches of broccoli, respectively. 

Sunday, I had a profound desire to not go shopping, so we had our customary leftover buffet, plus a charcuterie board of whatever I could find in the fridge, which included some fancy things we got for Christmas, that I recently rediscovered when I cleaned my room. I sliced up the leftover french bread, drizzled it with olive oil, sprinkled it with flaked kosher salt, and toasted it

and it was a damn fine meal.

For reasons I can’t explain, I decided to make cake balls for dessert. I have never made or eaten cake balls before, and I found the process slightly gross (you bake a cake, let it cool, crumble it up, and scrunch it into dough with big gobs of frosting. Then make balls, chill them, and dip them in candy melt), but they did turn out looking cute and cheery.

I had one and was underwhelmed; but to be fair, I may have underbaked the cake, so maybe the whole thing was a little more damp than necessary. WHO AMONG US. Anyway, the kids liked them okay. 

MONDAY I finally went shopping, and we had
Buffalo chicken salad

Salad, buffalo chicken from frozen, shredded pepper jack cheese, crunchy fried onions from a can, grape tomatoes, and blue cheese dressing. I’m being tiresome about calories, so I skipped the dressing on mine.

That night, Corrie made ice cream pies for her CALENDAR birthday, which, according to Fisher Rigamarole, is a distinct holiday from your birthday PARTY. 

She requested graham cracker crust, black raspberry ice cream, mini marshmallows, skittles, and gummy worms. She didn’t want any whipped cream or cool whip or cherries or anything. 

Tuesday
Market Basket subs, Doritos, bloomin’ onion, ice cream pies

On Tuesday we went to get her EARS PIERCED. Which was not fun, but she’s been wanting it done forever, and she’s very happy with the results. Then we went to get Market Basket subs. 

Are Market Basket subs especially good? Not especially! But we often get them when we’re going to the beach or on a day trip, so I guess they spell T-R-E-A-T. I have to admit, they’re cheap. They taste like Subway subs and cost what Subway subs should cost.

So we had that and chips and then I guess I felt weird not cooking anything, so I made some bloomin’ onions. You can use a knife to cut an onion into a blossom shape, but it’s way easier if you have an onion cutting device, WHICH I DO.

I made an attempt to take a soulful, romantic photo with one of my beautiful onion lotus blossoms, but I just ended up looking exhausted, which, by strange coincidence, I was.

I lost the recipe booklet that came with my onion machine, so I followed this recipe, which includes a nice zippy recipe for dipping sauce. 

Turned out pretty okay! I crowded the pan and was a little short on oil, but hey, the onion, she blooms.

Corrie had yet another wonderful day with most of her siblings over and lots of presents, including these incredible Bender fingerless mittens made by Lucy

And that was that! Whew!

WEDNESDAY
Instant Pot pork ribs, glazed carrots, cole slaw

Thursday I tried another new recipe: This Amy + Jacky Instant Pot recipe. Easy peasy. You mix up apple cider vinegar, soy sauce, brown sugar, and a few spices, and marinate the pork ribs in that for a while. Then you throw them in the IP and cook it on high pressure for 15 minutes, then let it natural release for ten minutes. Mine sat for somewhat longer than that because I was driving around (not to and from school, though! It’s vacation, so I was driving them to and from their friends’ houses), so they turned out a little unsightly

but I was excited, because I could tell how tender and juicy they were. You slather BBQ sauce on top and broil it up for a bit, and there it is.

I had made cole slaw in the morning (cabbage and carrots, mayo, cider vinegar, sugar, and pepper) and prepped some carrots to cook, so I put the carrots in the oven just before the meat went in, and it all came out at the same time.

The carrot recipe I used was this simple one from Recipe Tin Eats. This is a rare RTE recipe that does not turn out exactly as she describes, and I’m not sure what I’m doing wrong. Hers are shiny and sticky, and mine are just kinda toasty. They’re easy and popular, though, so it’s worth making them even though they’re not spectacular. I wish I had remembered a sprinkle of cardamom, though. 

Anyway, I thought it was a great meal. 

and the ribs really were juicy and ready to fall apart with a slight nudge from the fork. 

For sure making this recipe again, at least until it gets warm enough for Damien to use the smoker again. 

THURSDAY
Beef barley soup, pumpkin muffins

Thursday the older kids had their own plans, so I took Benny and Corrie out for an outing of our own. We hit a thrift store, a local place that does giant baskets of fries, the pet store, and a fancy candy store, and when I say my dogs were barking, I really mean it! I still had to make supper, and it was so late already, I figured I might as well forge ahead and make the meal I had planned, which was beef barley soup and pumpkin muffins. 

Yes, this is a weird combination, but I made it one time and certain people decided it was 100% ideal, so we’re locked in for a while. 

Here is my beef barley soup recipe:

Jump to Recipe

which I threw together in record time. I was kind of puzzled as to why it looked wrong, but when you’re FORGING AHEAD, you simply don’t have time to fret over these things!

Anyway, it was tomatoes. I forgot the tomatoes. They’re more important than I realized, and the soup was a little sad without them! Oh well. 

When the soup was simmering, I started pumpkin muffins,

Jump to Recipe

and discovered I had used all the oil for frying the bloomin’ onions, so I used melted butter. They turned out with a nice, more textured top

but the inside had a slightly waxy feel that I wasn’t crazy about. So now I know.

(I took that picture because, as I was pulling the twenty-four muffins out of the pan, I reminded myself that there would be a grand total of four people at home for dinner, and WHAT IF THERE’S NOT ENOUGH FOOD. Waste! Fraud! Abuse! Somebody alert Department Of Gnawing Everything so they can come over and fix things by clogging up the toilets and shooting the dog.) 

FRIDAY
Poke bowls

Today I am facing a rash promise I made to take the kids ice skating this week, which you may or may not have noticed is almost over, and yet we have not gone ice skating yet. There are two ice rinks around here (one ten minutes away, one forty), and neither one seems especially interested in . . . letting people ice skate on them? So we are aiming for the 7-9:00 spot, forty minutes away. Yes, in the EVENING. Maybe the world will come to an end before that happens. Of course I was counting on that to rescue me from having to do the FAFSA, and that didn’t work out, so probably we will have to go ice skating.

Anyway, first we will be eating something approximating poke bowls. Gonna cook up a bunch of rice and probably sear some Walmart tuna steaks, and I have chili lime cashews from Aldi, mangoes, some kind of green sprouts, and various pink and yellow and brown sauces. 

Saturday will be a regular day, and then Sunday we are going to a museum and will be getting back very late on the night before the first day back at school! Which is a great idea! It was my idea! Hooray! Somebody call the department of paste, frog, and caboose! I have a fever and the only cure is more measles!

I actually think I do have a fever, so. We’ll see who’s ice skating whom. 

5 from 1 vote
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French bread

Makes four long loaves. You can make the dough in one batch in a standard-sized standing mixer bowl if you are careful!

I have a hard time getting the water temperature right for yeast. One thing to know is if your water is too cool, the yeast will proof eventually; it will just take longer. So if you're nervous, err on the side of coolness.

Ingredients

  • 4-1/2 cups warm water
  • 1/4 cup sugar
  • 2 Tbsp active dry yeast
  • 5 tsp salt
  • 1/4 cup olive or canola oil
  • 10-12 cups flour
  • butter for greasing the pan (can also use parchment paper) and for running over the hot bread (optional)
  • corn meal for sprinkling on pan (optional)

Instructions

  1. In the bowl of a standing mixer, put the warm water, and mix in the sugar and yeast until dissolved. Let stand at least five minutes until it foams a bit. If the water is too cool, it's okay; it will just take longer.

  2. Fit on the dough hook and add the salt, oil, and six of the cups of flour. Add the flour gradually, so it doesn't spurt all over the place. Mix and low and then medium speed. Gradually add more flour, one cup at a time, until the dough is smooth and comes away from the side of the bowl as you mix. It should be tender but not sticky.

  3. Lightly grease a bowl and put the dough ball in it. Cover with a damp towel or lightly cover with plastic wrap and set in a warm place to rise for about an hour, until it's about double in size.

  4. Flour a working surface. Divide the dough into four balls. Taking one at a time, roll, pat, and/or stretch it out until it's a rough rectangle about 9x13" (a little bigger than a piece of looseleaf paper).

  5. Roll the long side of the dough up into a long cylinder and pinch the seam shut, and pinch the ends, so it stays rolled up. It doesn't have to be super tight, but you don't want a ton of air trapped in it.

  6. Butter some large pans. Sprinkle them with cornmeal if you like. You can also line them with parchment paper. Lay the loaves on the pans.

  7. Cover them with damp cloths or plastic wrap again and set to rise in a warm place again, until they come close to double in size. Preheat the oven to 375.

  8. Give each loaf several deep, diagonal slashes with a sharp knife. This will allow the loaves to rise without exploding. Put the pans in the oven and throw some ice cubes in the bottom of the oven, or spray some water in with a mister, and close the oven quickly, to give the bread a nice crust.

  9. Bake 25 minutes or more until the crust is golden. One pan may need to bake a few minutes longer.

  10. Run some butter over the crust of the hot bread if you like, to make it shiny and even yummier.

5 from 1 vote
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Beef barley soup (Instant Pot or stovetop)

Makes about a gallon of lovely soup

Ingredients

  • olive oil
  • 1 medium onion or red onion, diced
  • 1 Tbsp minced garlic
  • 3-4 medium carrots, peeled and diced
  • 2-3 lbs beef, cubed
  • 16 oz mushrooms, trimmed and sliced
  • 6 cups beef bouillon
  • 1 cup merlot or other red wine
  • 29 oz canned diced tomatoes (fire roasted is nice) with juice
  • 1 cup uncooked barley
  • salt and pepper

Instructions

  1. Heat the oil in a heavy pot. If using Instant Pot, choose "saute." Add the minced garlic, diced onion, and diced carrot. Cook, stirring frequently, until the onions and carrots are softened. 


  2. Add the cubes of beef and cook until slightly browned.

  3. Add the canned tomatoes with their juice, the beef broth, and the merlot, plus 3 cups of water. Stir and add the mushrooms and barley. 

  4. If cooking on stovetop, cover loosely and let simmer for several hours. If using Instant Pot, close top, close valve, and set to high pressure for 30 minutes. 

  5. Before serving, add pepper to taste. Salt if necessary. 

5 from 1 vote
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Pumpkin quick bread or muffins

Makes 2 loaves or 18+ muffins

Ingredients

  • 30 oz canned pumpkin puree
  • 4 eggs
  • 1 cup veg or canola oil
  • 1.5 cups sugar
  • 3.5 cups flour
  • 2 tsp baking soda
  • 1.5 tsp salt
  • 1 tsp cinnamon
  • 1 tsp nutmeg
  • 1/2 tsp ground cloves
  • 1/4 tsp ground ginger
  • oats, wheat germ, turbinado sugar, chopped dates, almonds, raisins, etc. optional

Instructions

  1. Preheat oven to 350. Butter two loaf pans or butter or line 18 muffin tins.

  2. In a large bowl, mix together dry ingredients except for sugar.

  3. In a separate bowl, mix together wet ingredients and sugar. Stir wet mixture into dry mixture and mix just to blend. 

  4. Optional: add toppings or stir-ins of your choice. 

  5. Spoon batter into pans or tins. Bake about 25 minutes for muffins, about 40 minutes for loaves. 

 

What’s for supper? Vol. 412: Food of America

Happy Friday! Happy Valentine’s Day! Damien and I are GOING OUT DANCING! Or, well, we are taking our kids to the school dance, presumably to watch the girls text each other and giggle, and the boys shove each other, and the little kids chase each other under the tables. I was discouraged (by my kids) from bringing in food, so none of this, this year:

I went to a Valentine’s Day dance in middle school, which was such a long time ago, it was still called “Junior High.” It was my first dance ever, and I had read a lot of Archie Comics, so I borrowed my sister’s bright pink dress with the flared skirt, paired with a wide, glossy, black plastic belt with a gold heart-shaped clasp, and a pair of pink heart earrings. I nervously crept through the door of the gym, and a teacher chaperone immediately cried, “Oh, don’t you look nice!” Which is how I knew I had worn the Wrong Thing. 

Thanks, brain, for remembering that in excruciating detail. So important.

Anyway, boy am I glad to be an adult. And you know what is important? Food! Here’s what we ate this week: 

SATURDAY
Leftover buffet with dino nuggets

The forecast warned us of a big storm Saturday night, so we went to the vigil Mass. But first it was the shopping turn of a child who made me very proud by picking out the things SHE WANTED, and steadfastly rebuffing the howls of complaints from her older sisters. For her frozen food supplement to leftover day, she picked dino nuggets because that’s what sheeee wanted. 

They also gave her a hard time about the weekend cereal and the desserts she chose, but she didn’t crumple. For real, being a teenage girl and actually expressing what you want, and sticking to it when your peers don’t like it, is almost heroic.

Also heroic was the leftover coconut chicken curry. I ignored all the other leftovers and just stuck with the curry, and oh my dammit, it was amazing.

Next time, I may make curry ahead of time just to have it several days old on purpose, because it was really great the first time, but as leftovers, it was MAGNIFICENT. 

SUNDAY
Buffalo wings and blue cheese dip, Doritos, hot pretzels, raw veggies

The big snow came as forecast, and in the midst of all that brilliant white, my pesky lingering headache turned into a full-blown migraine, so I noped out of shoveling and went back to bed. Bless Damien for making me feel like this was a reasonable thing to do. 

But I was feeling better by the afternoon, and it was, of course, the Super Bowl. We didn’t care about either team, but we do like hot salty football food, so I made some hot pretzels using the King Arthur recipe.

I’ve made it before, and it’s pretty easy, and they come out delicious, although they never really look like the picture, probably because I’m too impatient to roll the dough out into long enough snakes before shaping them. (And no, I never did get dressed, as you can see.) 

Anyway, you make the dough and let it rise (I used the slow cooker on “keep warm”), then cut the dough into lumps

And by the way, this is around the time of year last year I got my new-to-me cabinet and marble countertop from Marketplace, and it’s been SUCH a boon. I set it slightly lower then the other countertops, so it’s very convenient for things like kneading dough or decorating cakes. I have short legs, whatcha gonna do. 

Here’s what my workspace looked like before the new countertop:

and here how it looks right now:

If you look closely, you will see that I have discovered PVC pipe as the universal solution. 

So I have been continuing my decluttering tour, which launched, hmm, right around the time of the inauguration, for some reason. It’s turned less maniacal now and a little more grim this week, but I’m determined to deal with all the worst spots in the house by the end of February. So far I have cleared out the landing and turned it into a playroom, cleared out the laundry room, fixed and cleared out the white cabinet/craft area, re-hung the curtains in front of the gaps in the kitchen cabinets, and done lots and lots of scouring and scrubbing in both bathrooms and the oven, and also stuff like replacing a bunch of old smoke alarms and whatnot. And, I bought my very first Swiffer. 

Yesterday, I decluttered the hutch.

Before:

and after:

I have come to loathe this piece of furniture, and will replace when I can. But organizing it it led to shifting around some other stuff in other parts of the kitchen, and I had the revelation that the kid’s water bottles can go LOW DOWN ON THE BOTTOM SHELVES, and my seltzer and Damien’s soda can go AT WAIST HEIGHT because WE ARE OLD and OUR BACKS HURT. A lot of stuff in this house is still set up to keep meddling toddlers out of stuff, and we may have some problems right now, but not that! 

Okay, so anyway, the pretzels turned out nice! You brush them with melted butter when they come out of the oven, and they’re super soft and chewy and rich. 

Damien made a big pile of his excellent hot chicken wings with blue cheese dipping sauce. Here’s that recipe:

Jump to Recipe

He actually made some hot, some with BBQ sauce, and some plain; and I had the kids chop up a bunch of veggies, and I bought NAME BRAND Doritos. 

An extremely delicious meal. 

We scored some points with the teenagers by enjoying the halftime show, too, and I liked that guy’s pants. 

MONDAY
Spaghetti and meatballs

Every year when I do the shopping around Super Bowl Sunday, there is, of course, lots of football-priced ground beef available(it was $2.99 a pound here), and I cleared out the freezer a bit so I could stock up on that. And something about buying all that beef shifts my food thoughts into irresistibly American channels, so we had some of the saltiest, meatiest, least ethnically diverse meals imaginable this week. The kids have been pretty happy. 

Monday, spaghetti and meatballs. Here is my meatball recipe

Jump to Recipe

demonstrating my less-mess technique of baking or broiling the meatballs in the oven on a rack, so they keep their shape, and the grease just tidily drains off. 

And very good it was, spaghetti with meatballs. 

TUESDAY
Pulled pork, tater tots, corn

Tuesday we had a thing in the morning, so I started pulled pork early. Here is my tasty pulled pork recipe:

Jump to Recipe

Came out of the pot niiiiiice and tender. 

so I shredded it up

and put it back in the pot with the juice, to stay warm, while I cooked the tater tots, and also one bag of hilariously overpriced heart-shaped potato . . . things. I guess I was planning to serve this on Valentine’s Day, but this was Wednesday, I dunno. They were actually pretty good. Basically mashed potato in a crisp skin, same as those smiley fries. 

The kids had pulled pork sandwiches in deli rolls, but I had my preferred mode: Hot Pork Heap. Tater tots, then pulled pork, then corn, then red onion, the BBQ sauce. You can spot the potato hearts over to the left. 

This is also really good with some of that disgusting melted yellow cheese stuff that comes in a jar, but some of us are watching our figgahs. 

WEDNESDAY
Pizza

Wednesday I actually did some writing for once in my life, and completely lost track of time and had to ask Elijah to make the pizzas. Got home around 5:30 and finished them up, using, as you can see, the leftover meatballs, with pepperoni in between. 

Yum. 

THURSDAY
Burgers and chips

Just regular hamburgers, which I make in the oven on a rack like the meatballs, but right up under a hot broiler. 

On Wednesday, one of the schools called a snow day for one school on Thursday, and the two other schools said it would be a two-hour delay. Damien proposed a Fisher Flop-Out. I’m not saying I married him because of his ability to make up names that don’t quite mean anything but make me laugh, but I will say that this is the man who once called his kids “a bunch of freshwater jerks,” and THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT THEY ARE. So Thursday came and, while we slept, the other schools decided it made more sense to have a full snow day, so there you go. Fisher Flop-Out!

FRIDAY
Quesadillas, chips and salsa

I guess the kids at home can fend for themselves, actually, because as I mentioned, we will be out dancing our fool heads out, or anyway watching teenage girls texting each other while standing next to each other. It’s a pretty sweet life, even without the yellow melty cheese. 

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Hot chicken wings with blue cheese dip (after Deadspin)

Basic, tasty hot wings with blue cheese sauce

Ingredients

  • chicken wingettes
  • oil for frying

For the hot sauce:

  • 1/2 cup butter
  • 1/8 cup tabasco sauce
  • 1/8 cup sriracha sauce
  • salt
  • vinegar (optional)

Blue cheese sauce:

  • sour cream
  • blue cheese
  • optional: lemon juice, mayonnaise
  • celery sticks for serving

Instructions

  1. Fry the wingettes in several inches of oil until they are lightly browned. Do a few at a time so they don't stick together. Set them on paper towels to cool.

  2. Melt the butter and mix together wit the rest of the hot sauce ingredients. Toss the wings in the hot sauce.

  3. Mix together the sour cream and crumbled blue cheese. Use a food processor or whisk vigorously to break up the blue cheese. You can add lemon juice or a little mayonnaise to thin it.

  4. Serve with blue cheese dip and celery sticks.

 

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Meatballs for a crowd

Make about 100 golf ball-sized meatballs. 

Ingredients

  • 5 lbs ground meat (I like to use mostly beef with some ground chicken or turkey or pork)
  • 6 eggs, beaten
  • 2 cups panko bread crumbs
  • 8 oz grated parmesan cheese (about 2 cups)
  • salt, pepper, garlic powder, oregano, basil, etc.

Instructions

  1. Preheat oven to 400.

  2. Mix all ingredients together with your hands until it's fully blended.

  3. Form meatballs and put them in a single layer on a pan with drainage. Cook, uncovered, for 30 minutes or more until they're cooked all the way through.

  4. Add meatballs to sauce and keep warm until you're ready to serve. 

 

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Clovey pulled pork

Ingredients

  • fatty hunk of pork
  • salt and pepper
  • oil for browning
  • 1 cup apple cider vinegar
  • 2/3 cup apple juice
  • 3 jalapeños with tops removed, seeds and membranes intact
  • 1 onion, quartered
  • 2 Tbsp cumin
  • 1 tsp red pepper flakes
  • 2 tsp ground cloves

Instructions

  1. Cut pork into hunks. Season heavily with salt and pepper.

  2. Heat oil in heavy pot and brown pork on all sides.

  3. Move browned pork into Instant Pot or slow cooker or dutch oven. Add all the other ingredients. Cover and cook slowly for at least six hours.

  4. When pork is tender, shred.

What’s for supper? Vol. 411: You can’t fufu all the people all the time

Happy Friday! The star of my week was MY NEW FRYING PAN. I love this thing. I wish it had two “helper handles” rather than one long one and one helper, but other than that, it’s everything I wanted. Tons of frying space, even heat transmission, high walls, and you can just scrub it clean with no rigamarole. Always Avoid Rigamarole, Guys; that’s my motto. AARG. 

I’ve also been enjoying the paring knife I ordered to bump up my purchase to get free shipping. Feeling very fancy in the kitchen these days. 

Here’s what we ate this week. Well, starting with last week, because it got a li’l weird:

FRIDAY
Seared lemon basil scallops on coconut rice, spicy fried eggplant, and stuffed clams 

One of my earliest memories is going to a potluck in kindergarten and barely being able to see over the top of the table, and being absolutely bewildered and overwhelmed by the array of unfamiliar foods. I vaguely felt that I wasn’t allowed to take anything that I didn’t normally eat (I didn’t even recognize some of the utensils. SALAD TONGS, what??), so I got some baked beans and brought them back to my seat. I was actually fine with this, because I knew what beans were and I liked them! But a mom came over and clucked at me for just getting beans, and loaded up my plate with a bunch of other stuff. I don’t remember what, but the important thing was that someone else was in charge. 

 Anyway, now I am fifty years old, and when I am in charge, I tend to make a bewildering array of unfamiliar foods myself. I enjoy this, but I would also enjoy a plate full of beans. 

So I seared the scallops sort of casting one eyeball at this recipe, and they turned out nice, only I used too much oil 

They do cook up fast, though, so if you happen to have some scallops, this is a very decent choice of preparation. Before I did that, I put some frozen stuffed clams in the oven, and also I fried a bunch of eggplant. 

Here’s my recipe for fried eggplant

Jump to Recipe

It’s good to start at least an hour before dinner, because you need to salt the eggplant to draw out the moisture, then dredge them in batter and fry them, and you don’t want to crowd the pan.

They’re SO GOOD, though. Totally worth it. The batter includes baking powder, so you get those crisp, knobbly, bubbles on the outside when they fry, and the inside is just melty tender. I wish I had made some yogurt sauce or maybe some kind of spicy tomato thing, but there were no complaints.

I heated up the coconut rice from last week’s Thai meal and served it with the scallops, rather than saving it for Leftover Day on Saturday, because I knew the kids weren’t crazy about it, and I was. 

So it was a bit of a weird meal, but undeniably tasty. 

The other kids were eating pizza at the library (which is what inspired me to make a Grownup Meal), but Corrie was home, and didn’t want any of the foods I cooked, so I took the leftover eggplant batter and made a fried Corrie.

And I do believe this is what she ate for dinner. 

SATURDAY
Leftover Buffet, french bread pizza

A little spaghetti carbonara, a little Thai chicken, and this and that. 

I forgot to tell the kids to save the leftover leftover ham, though. Oops. 

SUNDAY
Italian sandwiches, fries

Sunday after Mass, I did something I’ve been hyping myself up to do for weeks: I cleared off the landing. For a while, it was the bedroom of a kid who would rather sleep on the landing than share a room with siblings; and then, predictably, it became a dumping area.

Corrie and I set to work (she owes me money for a book order, and she doesn’t mind being a runner for cleaning projects, as long as someone else is in charge), and three hours and six trash bags later, it looked like this:

Instagram-worthy, no. Much much much much better, definitely. A spot for the Barbie Dream House, plus Corrie’s typewriter and sewing machine. 

I bought a bunch of cleaning products and I’ve been tackling various areas of the house one at a time, lately. Because it turns out that when I feel powerless and overwhelmed for . . . . reasons . . . . it helps an awful lot to clean something! You peek your head over the tabletop, see the news headlines, and are overwhelmed by the incomprehensible and unfamiliar chaos, and you think, “Well, I know one thing I can fix.” It helps! And it’s cheaper than heroin.

I knew I was going to be working on this cleaning project all day, so I planned sandwiches for supper. Looks like we had salami, capicola, prosciutto, provolone, basil, and oil and vinegar. I had bought some tomatoes, but the kids forgot to bring them in from the car, and they froze, so that was out, bleh. 

I did buy a jar of those pickled vegetables, giardiniera? and threw them in the food processor along with a can of black olives, a little olive oil, and some red wine vinegar, and made it into I guess a sandwich spread. I don’t know if there is a name for this, but I liked it. 

We also had fries. Always a popular meal.

Also on Sunday, I discovered that the part of the oven door that I thought was permanently black because the enamel had been burnt off, was actually just coated with burnt-on grease. So I’ve been scrubbing away at that. I just … want things clean. Cleaner. 

MONDAY
Omelettes, roast squash sticks(?), spinach

Monday I tackled the laundry room. I didn’t take a “before” picture, but it was a “there’s a floor here somewhere” situation. Another few bags of trash, and here is the “after.”

You can’t really see it, but I labelled all the shelves. But I did it in CHALK, which you can erase, because there are few things more depressing than tackling a chaotic mess and uncovering permanent but irrelevant labels you put on last time you organized it, back when you were young and still full of hope. Now I am old and full of chalk. But at least I know where my sheets are. 

Also on Monday I got a little bit mad about egg prices and decided we weren’t gonna get pushed around, so I made omelettes. Look, this is a food blog, not a “life choices that make perfect sense” blog. This is the meal I meant to save the ham for, but it got tossed (because the kids were following the rules I had made; can’t complain).

The kids tried to persuade me that deli turkey and raw onion is a normal thing to put in omelettes. IT’S NOT. That’s weird. But I was making omelettes to order, so that’s what they had. 

I myself had cheddar and spinach, which is a DELIGHT. 

As is my new pan! Have I mentioned my new pan? I really like it. 

Then I had a couple of butternut squashes which I cut into thin pieces and roasted, with olive oil, cardamom, brown sugar, and cayenne pepper. This didn’t actually work very well.

The flavor was good, but I think if you are going to cut squash into such thin pieces, it would need to be deep fried to make it crisp; and if you are going to oven roast it, you should cut it into chunks. Also it took FOREVER to cut the squash into such small pieces. 

Don’t get me wrong, I gobbled it up. It was just a little peculiar. I actually mixed it up with some leftover shredded spinach and it was pretty tasty. 

TUESDAY
Hamburgers, chips

I’m a little nervous about the future of ground beef in this country, so I decided we might as well have burgers while we can. A couple of the big kids were over, and we just had burgers and chips, easy peasy. Simple pimple. Pretend I didn’t say that. 

Tuesday I also tackled the infamous White Cabinet and Environs, which looked like this:

I remember buying this cabinet NEW, which was an incredibly splurgy purchase at the time. It was going to change my life and make everything orderly and pristine. And it did, for about eleven days. Then the shelves started falling out, and the frame got all crooked so you couldn’t put the shelves back in, and this is more or less how it’s looked ever since. It looks like it has shelves, but they randomly tip forward and disgorge their contents onto the floor, and then people stack random things on top of that. Which is not my FAVORITE. 

So on Wednesday, I got a saw and a drill and this plank of wood that’s been hanging around in the kitchen, sawed that up, and built a sort of interior frame under each shelf. Then I sorted everything and threw out three more bags of trash, and now it looks like this:

THE DOORS CLOSE. Obviously haven’t gotten up to the “and environs” part yet, and my floor looks how floors look in New Hampshire in February, so I’m not even gonna apologize for that. 

But look! Over three days later, and it hasn’t fallen apart inside yet. 

The kids are pretending to be enthusiastic about having a place for everything, and that’s good enough for me. And I found eleven pairs of scissors (not a made up number).

WEDNESDAY
Chinese pork, pineapple, crunchy rice rolls

Wednesday the plan was char siu, but I was fooling myself about being home at the right time of day to baste a roast pork. So I made a marinade and put it in the Instant Pot with the pork and set it for 22 minutes. 

I have actually done something similar, with pleasant results, on days when I have enough time to take the cooked pork out of the Instant Pot, cut it, and then simmer it on the stovetop with the sauce for half an hour or so, to give the sauce a chance to thicken up and coat the meat. 

Jump to Recipe

But it being Wednesday, I didn’t have time for that, so I just cut up the meat and served it with pineapple and crunchy rice rolls.  

Tasted fine. It did have that nice char siu flavor, even if it wasn’t all glossy and sticky and lovely. 

On Wednesday morning, I realized I had kind of painted myself into a corner with the menu. My original plan was to make injera on Thursday, and you are supposed to start that fermenting at least four days ahead of time. Obviously I didn’t do that. So what I did was prep all the stuff for Thursday’s dinner on Wednesday morning. I’m just basically riding some kind of wave of nervous energy here. I don’t know how long it’s going to last, but I’m trying to put it to good use while it does.

I’ve also been doing some more wood carving in the evening. I like to listen to the wonderful show Exploring Music with Bill McGlaughlin in the evening and use that time to whittle. Here’s a couple of works in progress:

The first one is a hair ornament, and I think I just need to sand it a bit and stain it. The leaf, I don’t know what it is. It’s a thing that helps me sleep at night. 

Makes me remember it’s almost time to tap the trees, though!  I was telling the kids how, last fall, I went around identifying all the maple trees while they still had foliage, and tying orange cloth on them so I could find them in early spring. So Irene goes, “ohhhh, so I shouldn’t have been pulling those off all winter?” 

She was kidding. Pretty sure. I somehow ended up with ten kids who are constantly kidding. I am not sure how that happened. 

THURSDAY
Kuku paka, fufu, basmati rice, ube pudding

Thursday was a snow day, so I was delighted to realize I (a) had all the time in the world to cook and (b) had already done a lot of the hard part the day before. Behold, my mise en placing:

Clockwise, that’s onion; coriander, cumin, turmeric, and cayenne pepper; and ginger and garlic. 

Here is the recipe I was following, from my new best friend Recipe Tin Eats. 

You salt and pepper your chicken thighs and drumsticks and then brown them in oil. In your NEW PAN, if possible. 

Then you take the chicken out and fry up your onion, then ginger and garlic, then the spices, then add pureed tomatoes, coconut milk, and some kosher salt. Then you put the chicken back in and let it simmer. 

I let it simmer for about an hour, and then I moved it to the slow cooker for the rest of the day. 

My dears, it smelled incredible. As Nagi points out, this could easily be an Indian dish, but it is actually North African. So I thought it would be a great time to try  that Fufu mix I bought quite some time ago. 

I have never had fufu and struggled a bit to explain it to the kids. As far as I can tell, it’s a staple in Nigeria and Ghana (which I realize is West Africa. Look, I went to public school), and it’s good for filling you up when you don’t have a huge amount of meat, and it’s also good for sopping up sauce or juices. It’s made from starchy vegetables like cassava, yams, or plantains that you boil and then pound the hell out of in a giant mortar. Or, if you are me, it’s made out this white powder from a box:

I watched a few videos and concluded that nobody in this house has had fufu before, so I could basically do whatever I wanted. So I boiled a kettle of water and slowly added it to the powder while beating it viciously with a wooden spoon, until it became a very thick dough.

Then I added more water to the pot and let it cook for a little bit, and then I took the dough and formed it into balls. This was not easy, because for some reason, when I took it out of the boiling water, it was pretty hot. But somehow I managed. 

Fufu is supposed to be super smooth and free of lumps. OH WELL.  
I decided it would be wise to also make a big pot of rice! I made basmati rice (I rinsed the rice and put it in the pot with 1.5 cups of water for every cup of rice, brought it to a boil, then let it simmer for I think 18 minutes, and then turned off the heat, fluffed it, and let it sit for another ten minutes. Turned out great.)

So here’s the chicken curry after cooking in the slow cooker all day:

Dang, you guys. The meat was incredibly tender, and the sauce was MAGNIFICENT. So savory and warming and friendly and rich, but not too spicy. (I did cut the cayenne pepper in half, which Nagi suggested might be wise.) 

I had a thigh and a drumstick and it was such a filling meal, I didn’t even eat all of it, which is kind of. . . not how I usually act. 

The kids all tried the fufu, and nobody was crazy about it, which is understandable. I thought it was super good when you pull off pieces and roll it around in the sauce.

Probably not gonna make fufu again, but it was a fun experiment. I do want to order it in a restaurant at some point, to see how it’s supposed to taste! I will most definitely make this curry again, though. Damien and I really loved it. 

While I was hunting in the cabinets for the fufu mix, I found another little international impulse purchase, and it seemed like a reasonable time to use it. 

This is just basically instant pudding. You just add hot water, stir, and pour it into molds and let it set in the fridge for a few hours. 

We opted for PURPLE HEARTS OF UBE. 

I liked it! Tasted yammy. Again, no one else was crazy about it, but at least now we know. 

FRIDAY
Spaghetti

The last few days were a bit challenging for the kids, so I decided to relent and serve Regular Old Spaghetti today, and they are glad. 

Oh, it turns out the plank of wood that was in the kitchen, that I sawed up to fix the white cabinet? That was a piece of Benny’s door frame that fell off. 

Look. One thing at a time. All one can do is try. 

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Fried eggplant

You can salt the eggplant slices many hours ahead of time, even overnight, to dry them before frying.

Ingredients

  • 3 medium eggplants
  • salt for drying out the eggplant

veg oil for frying

3 cups flour

  • 1 tsp baking powder
  • 1 Tbsp cumin
  • 1 Tbsp paprika
  • 1 Tbsp red pepper flakes
  • 2-1/2 cups water
  • 1 Tbsp veg oil
  • optional: kosher salt for sprinkling

Instructions

  1. Cut the ends off the eggplant and slice it into one-inch slices.
    Salt them thoroughly on both sides and lay on paper towels on a tray (layering if necessary). Let sit for half an hour (or as long as overnight) to draw out some of the moisture. 

  2. Mix flour and seasonings in a bowl, add the water and teaspoon of oil, and beat into a batter. Preheat oven for warming. 

  3. Put oil in heavy pan and heat until it's hot but not smoking. Prepare a tray with paper towels.

  4. Dredge the eggplant slices through the batter on both sides, scraping off excess if necessary, and carefully lay them in the hot oil, and fry until crisp, turning once. Fry in batches, giving them plenty of room to fry.

  5. Remove eggplant slices to tray with paper towels and sprinkle with kosher salt if you like. You can keep them warm in the oven for a short time.  

  6. Serve with yogurt sauce or marinara sauce.

 

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Quick Chinese "Roast" Pork Strips

If you have a hankering for those intensely flavorful strips of sweet, sticky Chinese roast pork but you don't want to use the oven for some reason, this works well, and you can have it in about an hour and a half, start to finish. You will need to use a pressure cooker and then finish it on the stovetop.

Ingredients

  • 4+ lbs pork roast

For sauce:

  • 3/4 cup soy sauce
  • 1/4 cup oyster sauce
  • 1/4 cup hoisin sauce
  • 1/4 cup mirin
  • 3/4 cup honey
  • 1 tsp white pepper
  • 2 tsp Chinese five spice

Instructions

  1. Blend all sauce ingredients together. Put the pork in the Instant Pot, pour the sauce over it, close the lid, close the valve, and set to high pressure for 22 minutes.

  2. When pork is done, vent. Remove pork and cut into strips, saving the sauce.

  3. Put the pork in a large sauté pan with the sauce and heat on medium high, stirring frequently, for half an hour or more, until sauce reduces and becomes thick and glossy and coats the meat.

What’s for supper? Vol. 410: You put the child in the coconut and eat it all up

Happy Friday! Let’s hop to it! Here’s what we had this week: 

SATURDAY
Leftover Buffet with frozen french bread pizza

Nothing to report, except that I finally broke down and ordered a new frying pan. I’ve had this 15″-inch paella pan from Aldi that I use constantly, because it’s so nice and big and I like how it has handles on both sides. 

But the metal is very thin (which is appropriate for a paella pan, but I almost never make paella), so it’s not great for frying; and I really cannot deny that we’ve been steadily eating little scraps of nonstick surface material pretty constantly for several years now. And it gets rusty if you don’t dry it after washing, which of course we don’t.  But it’s so big! And has handles!

So I bullied my money-loving heart into looking at a bunch of new pans and good used pans. Super hard to find a fifteen-inch frying pan, it turns out, except for cast iron, which I DON’T WANT. I know how to season them and I know how to cook with them. I just don’t want them, and I don’t have to explain myself! 

I settled on this fourteen-inch stainless steel one from Cuisinart, with a long handle and a short one. It cost five cents less than $40 you need to spend to get free shipping, so I also ordered a paring knife and used my new customer discount, so I got free shipping and a paring knife and a pan for less than the pan by itself. Yay!

Gosh, this is a boring story. Sorry. Anyway, that was Saturday. 

SUNDAY
Chicken caprese sandwiches, chips

Sunday I finally followed through on my dire warnings to the family (I really know how to market things) and forced everyone to sit down on Sunday afternoon and watch that 2021 Macbeth with Denzel Washington. Hoooooo boy, it was great! Absolutely wonderful. My eyes were bugging out half the time, and I gasped at least five times, and laughed several times, too, which is how Macbeth is supposed to be.

 

My only teeny tiny quibble is that the character of Macduff was not really anything special. You can do a lot with that role, and he really didn’t, unless I missed it. But overall, very thoroughly enthusiastically recommended. Most of the kids at home right now were not familiar with Shakespeare yet, but they followed it well enough, and enjoyed it. Corrie (who is nine) just straight up could not follow it, so she read Case Closed instead, which is fair enough. 

Next we are going to watch Kurosawa’s Throne of Blood, which is his take on Macbeth. We watched The Hidden Fortress last week, which made me want to see Throne of Blood, but I thought we should see regular Macbeth first. (I think we did a free trial of Apple Whatever to watch Macbeth, and then cancelled it when the movie was over.) 

When the movie was over, we had supper, which I had cleverly prepped in the early afternoon. Roast chicken with salt and pepper, tomatoes, fresh basil, fresh mozzarella, olive oil and vinegar on ciabatta rolls; and chips. 

Actually I think we were out of olive oil. 

I forgot, I also made a sort of bread pudding in the afternoon, just for a snack. We had a pile of stale french bread from last week, and there was an unopened carton of eggnog left over from New Year’s Eve.

I know that sounds like an insanely long time ago! but it was sealed up and it tasted fine. So I tore up the bread and put it in a buttered casserole dish, mixed some eggnog together with a bunch of eggs and poured that over the bread and let it soak for a while. Then I dotted it with butter and topped it with cinnamon sugar, and baked it until it was firm, probably 35 -40 minutes.

Not stupendous, but pleasant, and I felt thrifty to have used up some old food, and the kids were surprised to have a fresh-baked little snack in the afternoon. 

MONDAY

Monday was Sophia’s driving test, and she passed! Woo hoo!

I have now taught six kids how to drive, and only four of them have hit my parked car, that I can remember, and only one of them was somehow mad at me for it. 

The next one in line to get her license is this punk

and as you can see, she already knows the basics. (SHE IS SEVENTEEN, SOB.) 

I don’t remember what we ate on Monday. Oh, ham. Plus hot pretzels and peas. No wonder I didn’t take a picture. 

TUESDAY
Thai chicken thighs, coconut rice, tomato and cucumber salad

Tuesday, I didn’t have to go anywhere besides the regular run, so I was pretty hyped to have time to try two new recipes: First Thai Tumeric Chicken (Gai Yang Khamin) from Recipe Tin Eats. For once in my life I was smart and did not tell the family that I was going to be using fish sauce, which, as we know, smewws wike cat fwow-up.

The marinade only has a few ingredients, but there are several powerhouses in there: Fish sauce, oyster sauce, crushed garlic, and turmeric, plus brown sugar and pepper. I was sadly out of white pepper (I think I used it to fend rabbits off my tulip bulbs), so I used black. 

Nice marinade. 

Then, while that was marinating, I was even more hyped to make the side dish that Nagi recommends, which is coconut rice. Now, I love coconut rice far, far more than is reasonable. I mean it’s something I think about kind of a lot. If you filled up an entire room with coconut rice and told me I had to eat my way through to the middle to rescue my child from death, I would do it, and then lovingly take her hand, ask her to hang on a second, and then go ahead and eat the rest of the coconut rice. 

The government, in its wisdom, sent me a random EBT card (which we don’t usually qualify for) because we qualified for reduced lunch at some point, but because of Covid(?), and our school (which we don’t go to; and the school we do go to doesn’t offer lunch) didn’t serve school lunch over the summer, and they felt bad about it, or something? This isn’t the first time this has happened. Anyway, I had a magic money card, so I bought a big sack of jasmine rice. I feel that the more government stupidity you can convert into rice, the better, so I got a really big sack. With elephants on it!

Here is the Recipe Tin Eats recipe for coconut rice. You have to rinse the rice, of course, and then soak it for an hour. Then you drain it, add warm coconut milk with water and some sugar and salt dissolved in it, and cover and cook it in the oven for 40 minutes, then let it rest 15 minutes before fluffing and serving. I did it exactly like she said and it turned out SO GOOD. Absolutely fluffy and light, evenly cooked, wonderfully fragrant, not sweet, but rich. Oh man. 

She also said this chicken and rice is often served with tomatoes and cucumbers, so I made up a big bowl of that with no dressing or anything, because I figured the kids might want something really straightforward. 

The chicken is simple, but it does need to be basted twice. It didn’t turn out with a thick, sticky sauce like hers did, but maybe that would have happened if I left it in the oven a little longer, or basted it more thoroughly. It was still extremely tasty, and juicy!

The turmeric was the star, and the oyster sauce and fish sauce just gave it a sort of robustness, and the whole effect was very warming and pleasant, a little bit tangy, but not aggressive or spicy; and the flavor permeated the meat. It wasn’t wildly popular with the family, but they ate it. Maybe I will experiment with the sauce and see what I can do to make it thicker. 

All in all, quite a delicious meal. 

The kids were meh about the coconut rice! Can you believe that? I was forced to eat my way through the entire roomful almost all by myself. 

WEDNESDAY
Hot dogs, veg and hummus, french fries

Wednesday is just always a day of shenanigans, so I planned a very easy meal. I even splurged on a few bags of those “quick cook” fries, which I was delighted with when I tried them one other time. Well, it DIDN’T WORK. They were just as slow as any frozen fry! Very disappointing. I was forced to drown my sorrows in hot dogs while I was waiting. 

THURSDAY
Spaghetti carbonara

On Thursday, my beautiful new pan finally arrived. The paring knife has yet to come, but I hope they didn’t forget, because I gotta pare some stuff. But look at this lovely pan:

PIC 

(There is no pic, actually, because I managed to crack the faucet last night, so poor Damien is in there putting a new one in, and I don’t want to bother him.) 

Sadly, it came after I already fried up three pounds of bacon for spaghetti carbonara; so the horrible old paella pan had a fittingly glorious swan song, I guess.

Maybe I posted this picture

with the caption “Spectacular new image from the Hubble telescope. This is a protoplanetary nebula with an unusual amount of infrared radiation. God is such an artist.”

and I guess today I should probably share the zoomed-out version, which is this:

I still think it’s pretty!

Goodbye, old pan. You were always terrible, but at least your handles didn’t fall off. 

Damien is making some rash statements about how now I can throw out the old pan. I don’t really know what he means by that. It’s something old and gross for which I have frequently professed my hatred, and he wants me to just get rid of it, like it’s garbage? What if I need it? 

He knows me, so when he saw me transforming into a pan goblin right before his eyes, he hastily suggested that maybe I could use it in my garden. And now you know the main reason I have a garden: So I can put old crap in it, to avoid throwing it away, which would give me a deep and personal pain that you might not be able to understand if you grew up flying to Hawaii for Thanksgiving and having a mariachi band at your First Communion party.

Anyway, I went out into the yard (which, unlike some people’s childhood yards, has neither a hydraulic pool cover nor an aviary) and got my new stock pot, which I recently bought for myself for a treat, and which was full of ice with feathers floating in it, because. . . look, it’s complicated. I had my reasons. I cleaned it very thoroughly. And I AM going to use my old, gross stock pot in the garden. It’s going to be a garden pot. With handles! 

You know what, I don’t like your tone. I’m not saving you any coconut rice. 

So I prepped all the bacon and the cheese and ground pepper and whatnot

Pretty pretty! and then this comes together nice and quick. YUM YUM. It’s fine for me to have seconds, because I did twenty minutes of pilates today. Well, more like eighteen minutes, with two minutes of shouting, “Come ON, lady!” 

And I didn’t overcook the pasta!

FRIDAY
Mussels and eggplant??

So Friday, I knew the kids were going to be at a library lock-in event, where they would be fed pizza, so I thought it was my chance to make something nice for me and Damien. But it’s Friday, so fish. Well, one thing and another, blah blah blah, and by the time I got to the fish counter, I was a little rattled, and came away with a pound of scallops, some fingerling potatoes, and two big eggplants. Because menu planning is kind of my THING. 

There are various recipes using at least two of those ingredients together, but I think I’ll probably just do something really simple with the scallops, like sear them and serve them with lemon butter with hot pepper flakes or something, and then maybe do fried eggplant slices.

Jump to Recipe

Maybe some noodles or risotto or something. And throw the potatoes out the window! Throw them in the garden. 

Have you seen my garden? This is my garden today. 

I’m growing snow. It’s going great.  It’s organic. 

Like many people, I spent a certain amount of time this week tear-assing around the house scrubbing stuff and fixing little things. By the time we get through the last confirmation hearing, this house is going to be spotless. Which is good, because at some point, I’m going to fill the whole thing up with coconut rice. The whole thing! 

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Spaghetti carbonara

An easy, delicious meal.

Ingredients

  • 3 lbs bacon
  • 3 lbs spaghetti
  • 1 to 1-1/2 sticks butter
  • 6 eggs, beaten
  • lots of pepper
  • 6-8 oz grated parmesan cheese

Instructions

  1. Fry the bacon until it is crisp. Drain and break it into pieces.

  2. Boil the spaghetti in salted water until al dente. If you like, add some bacon grease to the boiling water.

  3. Drain the spaghetti and return it to the pot. Add the butter, pieces of bacon, parmesan cheese, and pepper and mix it up until the butter is melted.

  4. Add the raw beaten egg and mix it quickly until the spaghetti is coated. Serve immediately.

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Fried eggplant

You can salt the eggplant slices many hours ahead of time, even overnight, to dry them before frying.

Ingredients

  • 3 medium eggplants
  • salt for drying out the eggplant

veg oil for frying

3 cups flour

  • 1 tsp baking powder
  • 1 Tbsp cumin
  • 1 Tbsp paprika
  • 1 Tbsp red pepper flakes
  • 2-1/2 cups water
  • 1 Tbsp veg oil
  • optional: kosher salt for sprinkling

Instructions

  1. Cut the ends off the eggplant and slice it into one-inch slices.
    Salt them thoroughly on both sides and lay on paper towels on a tray (layering if necessary). Let sit for half an hour (or as long as overnight) to draw out some of the moisture. 

  2. Mix flour and seasonings in a bowl, add the water and teaspoon of oil, and beat into a batter. Preheat oven for warming. 

  3. Put oil in heavy pan and heat until it's hot but not smoking. Prepare a tray with paper towels.

  4. Dredge the eggplant slices through the batter on both sides, scraping off excess if necessary, and carefully lay them in the hot oil, and fry until crisp, turning once. Fry in batches, giving them plenty of room to fry.

  5. Remove eggplant slices to tray with paper towels and sprinkle with kosher salt if you like. You can keep them warm in the oven for a short time.  

  6. Serve with yogurt sauce or marinara sauce.

What’s for supper? Vol. 407: Model citizen

Happy Friday! Today has been my week to slowly come back to life. A little yoga, a little writing, and actually, in retrospect, kind of a lot of cooking and baking. As I was reviewing my photos for the week, I noticed the theme was ORANGE, plus yellow and red. You could do worse in the middle of January. 

Here’s what we ate this week:

SATURDAY
Spicy chicken sandwiches, chips

Usually Saturday is Leftover Buffet, but I had some thawed boneless skinless chicken thighs that needed to be used ASAP, I forget why; so after I shopped, I made these sandwiches from Sip and Feast. 

It’s a few steps, but doesn’t take any particular skill, and you get a tremendous payback in flavor and texture. You season the chicken thighs, brown them in oil, and lay sliced cheese on them and cover them. While the cheese is melting, you cut the tops off a bunch of shishito peppers and blister them quickly in a pan, and slice up some red onion. Serve it all on soft brioche buns with BBQ sauce. Just delicious and delightful.

Saturday night, I made a double batch of King Arthur Flour Chewy Cranberry Orange cookies, which I made for the first time before Christmas. They are super easy (everything just gets dumped into one bowl) and very cheery, friendly cookies. Doesn’t look like I took any pictures, but they turned out very similar to the pic on the site, which tells you how easy they are! I did end up baking them for a slightly shorter time than recommended, based on past experience.

SUNDAY
Rotisserie chicken/Chili’s 

On Sunday, we were supposed to go to my sister’s new baby’s baptism.  The kids were too sick to go, so I bought a couple of rotisserie chickens, fries, and raw vegetables for them, and planned for me and Damien to go to the baptism, then go out to eat. But I woke up with a rotten sore throat, which is no kind of gift to bring to babies across state lines. Boo! I want to see my family!

However, I soon realized that we were actually sitting pretty for the day. Damien and I had gone to the vigil Mass on Saturday, so — get this, people with little kids: On Sunday morning, my son got everyone up and dressed, and took them to Mass in his car, and what I did was stay in bed, not get dressed, and slowly sip coffee.  Incroyable. 

I milked this situation as long as I possibly could, and then realized that, because I was home on Epiphany, I could mess around with some king cake. Baking when you really don’t have to and you’re not in a hurry is a very different experience from, well, every other kind of baking.

We usually have some kind of cream cheese-filled king cake on Mardi Gras, so I tried something different: Rosca de Reyes. I’m on a King Arthur Flour jag, so I used their recipe, which is supposed to look like a crown with jewels. 

I made a double recipe of the dough, and then decided we really needed candied orange peels, so I made up a bunch of those, using this Epicurious recipe. You cut the ends off, score it into quarters, and remove the peel and pith.

Then you, uh, eat all the peeled oranges. Because you are sick, and need the vitamin C. 

I actually used a ruler to cut the peel into 1/4-inch slices, because I have made peace with the fact that I shrimply cannot eyeball fractions of an inch.

You simmer the sliced peels in water, rinse them twice, and then simmer them in sugar water for 45 minutes. 

Pretty pretty. Note: I doubled the amount of oranges, but used the same amount of sugar and water for simmering, which worked fine.

Then you drain the peels again and toss them with more sugar and spread them out to dry. At this point, I finally read to the end of the recipe and discovered the peels are supposed to dry for 1-2 days, which, oh well. I did pop them in a low oven for half and hour and they turned out great. I LOVE candied citrus peels. Gotta make more. 

Back to the sweet bread! You let the dough rise, then roll it out, slather it with melted butter, and fill it with cinnamon, sugar, orange or lemon zest, and whatever else you like. What I had was some slivered almonds, dried cranberries, lemon zest, and something called tutti frutti that I got from the Indian section of the International Market

and I was pretty pleased with the combination.

You roll the dough up like for cinnamon rolls, and form them into a ring around a center, like greased ramekin, to keep the shape.

I put most of the candied orange peel on, but then decided to take most of it off before baking. You are supposed to snip vents all around, which I did, but didn’t make them big enough, so they partially closed up. I did stuff some candied orange peels into the vents, which was a good idea. And don’t forget to add a baby, or a dry bean, or something for someone to find!
Then you brush the bread with egg wash and bake.

And they turned out great!

Very pretty, shiny, and bright. 

Would have been absolutely splendid if I had some candied cherries to decorate them with, but I was pleased. 

I overbaked them a tiny bit, which I always do, and it was pretty finicky getting the piping hot bread rings off the piping hot ramekins, but overall, a success. I strewed the rest of the orange peels over the top when they came out of the oven. 

Tender inside, halfway between bread and cake, rich and medium-sweet. 

Nobody found the dry bean I hid inside, and then I went back for seconds before bed and found it in the last piece, so that was a little anti-climactic. The person who finds the bean (or baby or whatever) is supposed to throw a party on Candlemas, and if anyone does that, it will probably be me, so there you go. 

Oh, so for supper, Damien and I figured we had already been planning to eat out, so we splurged and Door Dashed Chili’s, and then locked ourselves into our room and ate it without taking any pictures. Long live Chili’s.

Cheers Beer GIFfrom Cheers GIFs

Not gonna lie, the rosca de reyes was a lot of work, and I probably won’t make it again. I guess when it comes down to it, sweet bread isn’t really my favorite. I’d rather either have regular bread, or else something much sweeter. I do want to try one of those star-shaped epiphany cakes, though, because dang, those are pretty. 

MONDAY
Pork nachos

I had made a double recipe of king cake just out of sheer habit, but we only ate one, so I brought the other one to Clara’s place, which gave me a chance to finally see her apartment. It’s very nice. Full of light and pretty things, and it smelled good.

But otherwise, Monday was super duper vacation is really really over now day. It began with my car inexplicably falling off itself.

What appears to be blood in the grass is just spray paint from some Halloween costume project. But it fits. 

I’m pretty sure this is a job for zip ties, but it’s been too freaking cold outside to really deal with it, so I’ve just been driving like a model citizen, so as not to attract any unwanted police attention, because you are required to have two license plates in this state. Also because my driver’s license expired. I’ll deal with it! I’ll get to it! Model citizen!

In keeping with the general tone of day, I grimly hurled a hunk of pork into the Instant Pot and added, I don’t know what, cider vinegar, cumin, salt and pepper, chili powder, and pickled jalapeños and a bunch of the juice, and pressed the “meat” button. When the meat was done

I shredded it and made two pans of nachos, one with just chips, meat, and cheese, and one with cheese and also some kind of horrible melty jar cheese stuff, more japapeños, and a bunch more cumin and chili powder.

and served it with salsa and sour cream.

And it wasn’t that good! The kids ate almost none of their special mild weenie tray, and I just bundled it all up in tin foil and put it into the fridge until it’s time to throw it away this weekend. And so Monday passed. 

I see from my camera roll that Monday was also the day I locked myself in my room and tried out this lip plumper that I ordered right after having hernia surgery and turning fifty. I won’t be sharing the pictures, but my conclusion is that some lips are probably fine as they are. Especially if you’re otherwise a model citizen. 

TUESDAY
Beef barley soup, artisan bread

Tuesday it was still cold and horrible out, and I sure wasn’t making much progress with the million looming deadlines I have, so it seemed like a soup and bread day. I had bought a bunch of beef when it was on sale, so I made a huge pot of beef barley soup

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which is always nice. Then, although I’ve had no success with this in the past, I decided to make some of that “artisan bread” (which always sounds like a euphemism to me, like “sandwich artist” or “sanitation engineer”) which you don’t have to knead and which you bake it in a dutch oven, which I don’t have. I thought it might work out this time, though, because I discovered that Nagi of Recipe Tin Eats has a recipe, and Nagi is the last honest person on the internet, and writes out her recipes so they are actually useful. Stuff like “Dough will be wet and sloppy – not kneadable, but not runny like cake batter” and she tells you in the recipe where to look in the video, to make sure you’re doing it right. I feel like Nagi is on your side, in a way that no one else is. And she has such cute little hands.

Anyway, I made the dough, and it was wet and sloppy, not kneadable, but not runny like cake batter

and let it rise for about three hours while I went out to do the afternoon school run and errands. When I came back, it had doubled in volume and was wobbly like jelly and the top was bubbly, just like Nagi said. 

I did the alternative to the dutch oven instructions, where you flop the dough onto a hot pan and then immediately fill another pan, below it in the oven, with boiling water, and then slam the oven shut and let it steam while it bakes. 

Turned out great!

Crusty and crunchy on the outside, tender and chewy on the inside

Everyone liked it. Nagi does it again! Next time I’ll form the dough so it’s piled up a little higher and I get a slightly rounder loaf, but it was great as it was. The flavor is plain as can be, but it’s so simple and easy, and you can’t beat piping hot homemade bread with a big pot of savory soup.

This recipe fit in perfectly with my typical weekday, where I have a little time in late morning, and then I’m out of the house for several hours, and then I’m home about forty minutes or half an hour before we want to eat. She also includes instructions for making the dough the day before and refrigerating it overnight before you bake it. 

I made a very large pot of soup, intending to enjoy it again over the weekend, but tragically, it got left out overnight. Memory eternal, soup. 

WEDNESDAY
Chicken biryani, naan 

Wednesday I had an irresistible urge to make chicken biryani. I was planning to open Classic Indian Cooking by Julie Sahni, and see how it matches up to the recipe I usually use, but couldn’t find the dang book. So I went back to this basic, reliable one from Simply Recipes , but I goosed it with some of the wonderful biryani masala mix my friend Marissa sent. Normally I make the recipe as directed and then transfer it to the slow cooker for several hours, which is the only way I’ve ever been able to get fully and evenly cooked rice for biryani. So I got up to this point, 

which you can see has the chicken, spices, golden raisins, and liquid, but no rice yet, but also no room for rice. So I nervously took a chance and moved it to the Instant Pot, added the rice, and set it to high pressure for six minutes. 

Then I got distracted for a long time and forgot I was making supper, so I don’t really know how long it was until I checked on it, but when I did, it read “BURN,” which the Instant Pot does randomly, sometimes when it’s burnt beyond rescue, sometimes when it’s just whatever and fine. So I released the pressure with great trepidation, and . . . it was PERFECT. 

Dang. This is such tremendous food. So fragrant and comforting. I had bought some naan on the way home, and brushed a little melted butter on top and warmed it up in the oven, and topped the biryani with chopped cilantro and both toasted almonds and chopped up salt-and-pepper cashews, it was delightful.

Looks a little off because I was eating it by the light of the Christmas tree, but believe me, it was top notch. At first it seemed like it might be too mild, but the flavor built and warmed with every bite, which tells me I did it right! Biryani forever. 

THURSDAY
Chicken burgers, salad, pasta salad

Thursday I finally got Christmas packed up. I stripped the tree and threw it out the window (this was more fun when we used to live on the second floor, but it’s still a satisfying little ritual) and got everything all wrapped up and packed away, and vacuumed up forty metric tons of pine needles, and ruthlessly threw out a lot of tacky crap that we never use.

It was a good day to be busy all day and have an easy meal for dinner: Chicken burgers! Yay. 

I didn’t really have a plan for a side dish, but there was enough this-and-that in the fridge

that it was pretty easy to throw together a decent pasta salad. 

Cilantro, back olives, canned diced tomatoes, shredded parmesan, diced raw peppers, and salami, and then some olive oil and balsamic vinegar. 

A very pleasant meal. I had my chicken with horseradish mayo. 

FRIDAY
Mac and cheese

I can just feel how much cheese is in this house, so we really need to have some lavish mac and cheese. I don’t really have a recipe; I just make a bunch of white sauce and then throw in whatever cheese I have, plus some hot sauce and sometimes some mustard. I mix that with cooked macaroni, pour into a buttered casserole dish, and top it with buttered panko bread crumbs and bake until you can hear it sizzling, and you cannot deny, that’s good stuff. 

And now I have to actually do that, and then run off to adoration. I’ll pray for yez all! Model citizen over and out. 

5 from 1 vote
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Beef barley soup (Instant Pot or stovetop)

Makes about a gallon of lovely soup

Ingredients

  • olive oil
  • 1 medium onion or red onion, diced
  • 1 Tbsp minced garlic
  • 3-4 medium carrots, peeled and diced
  • 2-3 lbs beef, cubed
  • 16 oz mushrooms, trimmed and sliced
  • 6 cups beef bouillon
  • 1 cup merlot or other red wine
  • 29 oz canned diced tomatoes (fire roasted is nice) with juice
  • 1 cup uncooked barley
  • salt and pepper

Instructions

  1. Heat the oil in a heavy pot. If using Instant Pot, choose "saute." Add the minced garlic, diced onion, and diced carrot. Cook, stirring frequently, until the onions and carrots are softened. 


  2. Add the cubes of beef and cook until slightly browned.

  3. Add the canned tomatoes with their juice, the beef broth, and the merlot, plus 3 cups of water. Stir and add the mushrooms and barley. 

  4. If cooking on stovetop, cover loosely and let simmer for several hours. If using Instant Pot, close top, close valve, and set to high pressure for 30 minutes. 

  5. Before serving, add pepper to taste. Salt if necessary. 

What’s for supper? Vol. 404: Serving spoon not found

Happy Friday! Sorry this is so late. I just managed to burn my neck on a pot of spaghetti, which is something I’ve never done before. You see, you’re never too old to learn something new. 

Here’s what we ate this week: 

SATURDAY
Leftover buffet with pizza pockets

Damien and I mainly had leftover lamb curry and rice, but there were plenty of other options. 

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You can see that this week’s leftovers include taquitos, which I bought to supplement last week’s leftovers. Thank goodness it’s almost Thanksgiving, that blessed time when nobody ever has any ridiculous situations with leftovers. 

SUNDAY
Chicken thigh sandwiches, fries

Sunday I learned that, unlike many of my lady friends, my yard is absolutely bristling with iron. After Mass, I went over the driveway several times with a magnet, because we had heaped up the demolished porch materials there and I didn’t want any more flat tires this year. Apparently you can buy a long magnet on a stick designed especially for this purpose; but that didn’t occur to me, so I used my fishing magnet on a cord, and probably looked like I was dowsing for water or aligning the dirt chakras or something as I shuffled back and forth, slowly swinging my magnet and scowling at the ground. I did find a FEW nails

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and also, as I said, lots of miscellaneous bits and pieces that stuck to the magnet. So that was kind of neat. 

Then I girded my loins and tackled Corrie’s room while Elijah took her and the others to see The Wild Robot. I used this room rescue method and it took about three-and-a-half hours. I didn’t find anything especially interesting up there, which in this context is a very good thing, and she was gratifyingly grateful when she got back and could see the rug again. 

I was pretty wiped out by evening, and I just gonna heat up some chicken burgers, but I had already taken the chicken thighs out of the freezer early in the day back when I was younger, so I went ahead and made these chicken sandwiches. They’re not hard at all to make, and I was glad to be rewarded for all my hard work with this highly yummy sandwich. 

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Heavily seasoned chicken thighs (I used Tony Cachere’s) browned slowly, and then you set some cheese to melt on the chicken and quickly blister up some whole shishito peppers. Serve on soft rolls with sliced red onions and BBQ sauce. So tasty.

MONDAY
Korean beef bowl, rice, sesame broccoli 

Monday, poor Lucy had all her wisdom teeth removed. Even more excitingly, the appointment turned out to be 45 minutes earlier than I thought it was. Lucy is pretty unflappable, but I am exceedingly flappable. I’m basically an entire aviary’s worth of flappability. BUT we got there before it was too too late, and then when we got home again, I got dressed. Truly, one cannot worry about what the oral surgeon’s reception staff thinks of one. That is no way to live. 

Eventually I pulled myself together and made some rice and Korean beef bowl.

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Fresh garlic and ginger, red pepper flakes, soy sauce, and brown sugar. Can’t go wrong. 

Then it was my night to clean the kitchen. I always start with the fruit and work my way around the kitchen until I get to the dishes. I buy lots of fruit every Saturday, and the grocery put-away kid just slings bags of new fruit on top of old fruit; so on Mondays, I sort out what’s left and toss anything that’s gone bad, give everything a good wipe-down, and just do some general fruit organization. I don’t know if weekly fruit organization is a task that other people have, but it’s kind of a big deal around here.

This week, we had SO many old withered apples, I think maybe still left over from apple picking, that I couldn’t make myself throw them away or compost them; so I started some applesauce, with some vague idea of kids happily eating bowls of warm applesauce for breakfast, which is silly on a number of levels. 

I had just bought an absolutely enormous new stock pot, so I quartered the apples (and also a few peaches and plums, while I was fruit sorting)

simmering in that with a little water, and when it reduced long enough, I moved it to the crock pot and set it to cook overnight. 

TUESDAY
Roast pork ribs, applesauce, sweet potato soufflé (?)

Smelled pretty nice in the morning. 

Not nice enough to eat yet, though, because, duh, I still had to process it, and our mornings are a lot of things, but they are not generally full of free time in which one could process applesauce. Also I had been a little nervous about burning and ruining the applesauce again, so I actually put too much water in there. SO, I drained some out, ran the remaining fruit through the food mill to remove the cores, seeds, and peels, and let it continue cooking uncovered for quite a while before it reduced down to actual applesauce. I threw in some butter and cinnamon and a teeny bit of salt, but decided to leave it unsweetened. Turned out nice! Good and dusky. 

Nothing like warm, homemade applesauce. Some of the kids did have some for a snack when they got home from school, which made me happy. 

We had roast pork ribs for the main thing (just salt and pepper, roasted under a hot broiler and turned once),

and then I had these big cans of sweet potato taking up space in the cabinet.

Princella! What even is that. 

Having no other ideas, I decided to try the recipe on the side of the can.

It’s kind of a dated recipe, I guess, almost a soufflé or a custard. You drain and mash the sweet potatoes and mix them with eggs, milk, brown sugar, salt, and cinnamon, and put that in a buttered casserole dish. Then you top that with a thick batter of butter, flour, and more brown sugar. It’s also supposed to have nuts in the topping, but I didn’t have any nuts. Then you bake it. 

I halved the sugar in the potato part, because it just sounded like too much dang sugar; but I kept the top very sweet, because I like sugar. It turned out lovely and fluffy, really closer to a dessert than a vegetable side dish, even with less sugar than the recipe called for (and that’s why I decided not to sweeten the applesauce). It was honestly almost like pumpkin pie, but with the crust on top. The texture was very tender, almost like bread pudding. 

It did take almost twice as long to cook as it said on the can. I did make a double recipe, but I was still a little surprised at that. 

The rest of the family thought it was fine at best. They are so weird. They don’t like Jello, they don’t like candied sweet potatoes. Some of them don’t like marshmallows! Or pudpding! Just plain nuts. Although I have to confess, I’ve had a completely out-of-control sweet tooth lately, and I’m about three days away from swizzling a stick of butter around in a bowl of sugar and eating it like a candy bar. So who knows if this is actually good or not. (It is.)

WEDNESDAY
Chicken burgers, chips, veggies and dip

Wednesday I saw Millie, and she’s doing well! I truly aspire to be half as energetic as she is, and she’s ninety. I was telling her about various projects, and she said, “You’re like me; you’re a pusher.” That made me feel pretty good.  

I did go ahead and serve those chicken burgers. Poor Damien has been driving to Manchester and Concord, sometimes both, every day all week long, covering trials, so he’s exhausted and we’re missing him. 

THURSDAY
Kielbasa and red potatoes, biscuits

Bunch o’ doctor appointments, boo, plus an especially egregious run-around from the people in charge of putting medical things into computers, booooooo. All week, I had been intending to pick up cabbage or Brussels sprouts or something to cook up along with the potatoes and kielbasa, but despite going to the store 426 times, I never did. So I made the best vegetable of all: Biscuits. 

Here’s my biscuit recipe, which I have tweaked a bit since last time I posted it:

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I was pretty pleased to have two big hot trays of food coming out at the same time. 

Here’s the recipe for the potatoes and kielbasa.

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I sometimes serve all or part of the sauce as a dipping sauce, but this time I dumped it all on halfway through cooking, and it turned out nice. 

and then I fell asleep on the couch. I’m too old for this! For what, I don’t know. I’m just too old. 

FRIDAY
Spaghetti

I have another doctor story from this morning, and the short version is that I didn’t get any coffee until 10:00 because I needed a test, and it was really sad. Then, after three days of me calling to ask if I really truly needed the test, I called one more time in the hospital parking lot, and they said, oh, no, you don’t actually need the test. So then I got some coffee. That’s it, that’s the story. I never really woke up, though. Made some spaghetti mostly in my sleep, and the kids are eating it and watching Frasier, and I’m writing in my sleep, if you didn’t notice. And now my story is all told!

If you’re one of my editors, I AM working on it. It’s almost done and I’ll have it to you asap. As soon as I find the sesame seeds. 

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Korean Beef Bowl

A very quick and satisfying meal with lots of flavor and only a few ingredients. Serve over rice, with sesame seeds and chopped scallions on the top if you like. You can use garlic powder and powdered ginger, but fresh is better. The proportions are flexible, and you can easily add more of any sauce ingredient at the end of cooking to adjust to your taste.

Ingredients

  • 1 cup brown sugar (or less if you're not crazy about sweetness)
  • 1 cup soy sauce
  • 1 Tbsp red pepper flakes
  • 3-4 inches fresh ginger, minced
  • 6-8 cloves garlic, minced
  • 3-4 lb2 ground beef
  • scallions, chopped, for garnish
  • sesame seeds for garnish

Instructions

  1. In a large skillet, cook ground beef, breaking it into bits, until the meat is nearly browned. Drain most of the fat and add the fresh ginger and garlic. Continue cooking until the meat is all cooked.

  2. Add the soy sauce, brown sugar, and red pepper flakes the ground beef and stir to combine. Cook a little longer until everything is hot and saucy.

  3. Serve over rice and garnish with scallions and sesame seeds. 

 

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Sesame broccoli

Ingredients

  • broccoli spears
  • sesame seeds
  • sesame oil
  • soy sauce

Instructions

  1. Preheat broiler to high.

    Toss broccoli spears with sesame oil. 

    Spread in shallow pan. Drizzle with soy sauce and sprinkle with sesame seeds

    Broil for six minutes or longer, until broccoli is slightly charred. 

 

5 from 4 votes
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One-pan kielbasa, cabbage, and red potato dinner with mustard sauce

This meal has all the fun and salt of a wiener cookout, but it's a tiny bit fancier, and you can legit eat it in the winter. 

Ingredients

  • 3-4 lbs kielbasa
  • 3-4 lbs red potatoes
  • 1-2 medium cabbages
  • (optional) parsley for garnish
  • salt and pepper and olive oil

mustard sauce (sorry, I make this different each time):

  • mustard
  • red wine if you like
  • honey
  • a little olive oil
  • salt and pepper
  • fresh garlic, crushed

Instructions

  1. Preheat the oven to 400. 

    Whisk together the mustard dressing ingredients and set aside. Chop parsley (optional).

    Cut the kielbasa into thick coins and the potatoes into thick coins or small wedges. Mix them up with olive oil, salt, and pepper and spread them in a shallow pan. 

    Cut the cabbage into "steaks." Push the kielbasa and potatoes aside to make room to lay the cabbage down. Brush the cabbage with more olive oil and sprinkle with more salt and pepper. It should be a single layer of food, and not too crowded, so it will brown well. 

    Roast for 20 minutes, then turn the food as well as you can and roast for another 15 minutes.  

    Serve hot with dressing and parsley for a garnish. 

 

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moron biscuits

Because I've been trying all my life to make nice biscuits and I was too much of a moron, until I discovered this recipe. It has egg and cream of tartar, which is weird, but they come out great every time. Flaky little crust, lovely, lofty insides, rich, buttery taste.

Ingredients

  • 6 cups flour
  • 6 Tbsp sugar
  • 1 tsp salt
  • 2 Tbsp + 2 tsp baking powder
  • 1 tsp cream of tartar
  • 1-1/2 cups (3 sticks) butter, chilled
  • 2 eggs
  • 2 cups milk

Instructions

  1. Preheat oven to 450.

  2. In a bowl, combine the flour, sugar, salt, baking powder, and cream of tartar.

  3. Grate the chilled butter with a box grater into the dry ingredients.

  4. Stir in the milk and egg and mix until just combined. Don't overwork it. It's fine to see little bits of butter.

  5. On a floured surface, knead the dough 10-15 times. If it's very sticky, add a little flour.

  6. With your hands, press the dough out until it's about an inch thick. Cut biscuits. Depending on the size, you can probably get 20 medium-sized biscuits with this recipe.

  7. Grease a pan and bake for 10-15 minutes or until tops are golden brown.

What’s for supper? Vol. 403: Nagi knows

Happy Friday! Since it is apparently indeed Friday. There has not been one single day this week when I knew what day it was, so why start now? 

I will begin with an abject failure from last Friday, which I hadn’t yet made when I wrote last Friday’s post. It was French onion pasta, and the recipe included fresh thyme, white wine, tons of freshly-grated cheese, and all kinds of lovely things. How could it go wrong? 

I still don’t know, but wheeee-ew. The recipe said to make sure you measure the liquids carefully so it didn’t turn out soupy. So I did, and it did. So I spooned off quite a bit of the liquid before baking it, and apparently that’s where all the flavor was? But also, it was still soupy. 

Doesn’t look terrible in this picture, but believe me. It was terrible. It tasted like the water you use to wash actual food. Man! Oh well. 

Anyway, on to what we had this past week: 

SATURDAY
Leftover buffet

In the morning, I drove into Nice New Hampshire and picked up a ton of windows from a guy who was converting a porch into a room.

The windows themselves are great (I think I got fourteen total), and also — and this may be something only cheapskate DIYers will understand — it was encouraging to get in on these materials so early in their life. Lots and lots of free and cheap windows are described as “collected to build a greenhouse but decided to go another route,” and that is . . . a little alarming. Because I am building a greenhouse/porch/solarium. But things will be different for me! I will collect windows, but I will not go another route! Probably!!

Then I went shopping, and we had leftovers for supper. I added taquitos, but there were so much leftover food, we didn’t really need them, and then Clara stopped by with some day-old baguettes from the bakery she works at. I myself mostly had the Middle Eastern Meatballs with yogurt sauce and Jerusalem salad, and also more day-old bread than you might think one person could even want.

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I’m amazed at how well this planned leftover day is working out. Much less food waste, obviously, and the fridge is much tidier; and people are actually looking forward to it, either because you get a second shot at a nice meal, or because of the frozen food I add. Most of all, it’s super helpful to have a stress-free meal to count on after shopping on Saturdays.

SUNDAY
Nachos

Sunday we had nachos (I make really subpar nachos, and I just don’t care. They’re just chips, seasoned meat, jalapeños, and cheese. Salsa and sour cream on the side. It’s fine. 

I also made Monday’s meal on Sunday. For whatever reason, I’ve been building up a supply of lamb shanks for the last several months, one or two at a time whenever they went on sale, and it was finally time to drag them all out of the freezer and do something. I decided on this curry recipe. 

I will tell you ahead of time that it was a tiny bit disappointing. It had all the right spices in it, but the end flavor was just kind of muddy, and the lamb was not nearly as tender as I hoped. It was good, just not great!

Anyway, I had fun making it. First I browned up the lamb

much to the dog’s interest. And I do mean MUCH

No description available.

and then I made a paste out of all the spices

then browned up some onions and other spices

then you add a bunch of chopped tomatoes and the spice paste

and also chicken broth and coconut milk, and then you put the lamb in. I let it simmer for several hours and then packed it into the fridge for the night. 

MONDAY
Lamb curry, rice, pita, pomegranates

Monday, the kids had the day off, and I think Moe and Clara stopped by for supper, but I can’t even remember which day that was. I started the lamb heating up a few hours before supper, and made a big pot of basmati rice. I soaked it first, and that really added to the light, feathery texture of the rice, so I’ll be doing that going forward. Gosh, I love basmati rice. 

A few hours before supper, I started some naan. I am not entirely happy with the various recipes I’ve tried, so this time I went with the Recipe Tin Eats version, which doesn’t include yogurt, but does include a little egg and ghee. 

Friends, Nagi was right again. It turned out so good. Much fluffier than any other naan I’ve made, and it had a nice flavor, too.

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I couldn’t find my iron frying pan, but this double-walled steel one worked fine. I wish I had been a little more assiduous about wiping the burnt flour out of the pan in between naans, but I will still very happy with the results. 

So then it was supper time! Rice was ready, naan was ready, and I had cut up some pomegranates and some cilantro, and all I had to do was combine the two pots of lamb curry into one very large, brimming pot and carry it into the dining room without–

never mind. I sloshed a little bit out, slipped in it, and sloshed a lot of it out. But didn’t drop any actual meat! But sheesh, what a mess. You can see, this is a fairly greasy recipe, which is one thing I wasn’t crazy about. I think you can see my actual slipping toe marks, which is kind of funny. 

ANYWAY, it was good, though!

Pretty good. Like I said, a little muddy, and just not as flavorful as I was hoping, considering how many THINGS went into it. There was a lot left over, and I cut the meat into pieces and returned it to the masala sauce, and I’m kind of looking forward to Saturday. It was fun having some of the big kids over, anyway. It’s very jolly when they’re here. 

TUESDAY
Bagel, egg, cheese, sausage sandwiches; OJ

Over the weekend, Damien pushed really hard and got the porch debris to the dump, which was a huge relief. On Tuesday, I got out there with a rake and got the small bits, so it looks much more respectabiggle out there. I found a very old bone which I’m about 87% sure is a chicken bone. 

In the late afternoon we had the pleasure of watching Moe read some of his short stories at an event at the college. He won a creative writing award and also recently got an internship with a publisher, and it was hard to say what was more gratifying: Hearing his excellent work, or hearing everyone say nice things about him!

Then we got home and had bagel sandwiches. I tried the oven rack toasting method again, and had slightly more success with the bagels than I did with bread, because they are more rigid

Turns out the kids are much more willing to eat duck eggs if you scramble them than if you fry them! Good to know. 

I don’t really blame the kids for feeling a little icky about eating the duck eggs. You spend enough time witnessing the ducks’ personal habits, and you start to feel a real need for some kind of buffer. I get it. Lucky for me, the main thing I care about is eating, so I love duck eggs, despite What I Know. 

WEDNESDAY
Chicken drumsticks two ways, vegetables and dip, chips

In the morning, I drove into Sticksville and picked up a beautiful heavy door, only $20. The lady says, “I’m sorry I can’t help you lift it; I’ve hurt my back” and I said, “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. I’m just rushing around lifting as much heavy stuff as I can before I have surgery myself” and she says “What kind of surgery?” and I said, “Uh, hernia.” and we just kind of looked at each other like, well, bitches be crazy. 

Then I got home and tried to do some writing, and then got an irresistible urge to, uh, plant a bunch of marigolds for the turtle to eat. 

I have an awful lot of seeds hanging around, and seeds go through my kitchen constantly. Last year I did some winter sowing (starting seeds inside jugs outdoors, like miniature greenhouses, so they are somewhat self-watering and are already hardened off and start to germinate earlier), which is a nice way to get through the dark part of winter. But I’m having fun finding edible plants I can grow right now. The turtle has been very active and adventurous lately, and is enjoying the geraniums and pansies I put in his tank. 

I roasted a bunch of chicken drumsticks with olive oil, salt and pepper, and then I made two sauces: One with honey, mustard, and lemon juice, and one with buffalo sauce and melted butter. Then I divided the chicken and mixed half with one sauce, half with the other. 

I did this in the morning, and then I had the kids start heating the chicken up in the evening while I was out, and by dinner time, there were two tasty chickens from which to choose. Also veggies and dip and chips. 

Pretty popular meal. It was only a tiny bit of extra work to do the two kinds of sauce. 

THURSDAY
Grilled ham and cheese, tomato soup with rice

Thursday is an absolute blur. In retrospect, I was starting to hatch a migraine (WHICH, I should mention, are much rarer than they used to be! Emgality has really made a difference), and it was one of those days where I had to think about where to put my foot for every step I took, etc. You know, just living is a lot of work sometimes. 

So for supper, we just had grilled ham and cheese on sourdough bread, and I heated up some condensed tomato soup with milk, and I put leftover basmati rice in mine. 

I absolutely love cream of tomato soup with rice in it. Makes you feel like you’re sitting in someone’s lap.

FRIDAY
Ravioli?

I feel like it might be ravioli. For lo, the migraine has come into full power and I don’t know much. But at least we have windows! Lots and lots of windows, and surely everything will work out, one way or another. Or maybe we’ll go another route. 

Speaking of which, I stopped interacting with Twitter about a month ago, and yesterday I finally started up with Bluesky. It’s nice! It’s like Twitter used to be, and lots of people are making a conscious effort to be friendly and pleasant and not horrible. If you’re there, let’s connect! 

What’s for supper? Vol. 401: Hot, fast, cheap, and salty, just like. . . someone else

Happy All Saints Day! It is a solemnity, which means it’s a meat day! But most of all, it is a candy day. I mean most of all it is a holy day. With candy.

But even more than that, it was a monstrously (not in the spooky fun way, but in the very adult boring way) busy week. Because I have the time management skills of a much stupider person, I left myself a ton of writing deadlines for the week before Halloween, and I wrote something like 12,000 words this week, which is a lot for a slob like me! So I planned meals accordingly

SATURDAY
Leftover Buffet plus taquitos and burritos

Left over from last week  was zuppa toscana, squash muffins, and bo ssam. Someone had put the soup in the fridge in its original pot, covered it with plastic wrap, and then put two pies on top of it, but you do what you gotta do (which is eat leftover soup, and it was delicious). 

SUNDAY
Kids spaghetti; adults Indian food

On Sunday Damien and I did our belated anniversary outing in two parts. First we went kayaking on Meetinghouse Pond, then we came home and I worked on Halloween costumes and Damien worked on . . . I forget what, he always has ten projects going. Probably cars or heating ducts or possibly 12,000 words of his own, which he just does, and does not make an ungodly fuss about.

Then we went out for Indian food. We had a vegetarian sampler plate which had pakora and various other fried delicacies that I forget what they’re called, with a trio of dipping sauces. I ordered beef rogan josh (which sounds like a podcaster, but is actually delicious). Having nothing to prove, I requested “medium spicy,” and it was perfect. Damien had I think lamb chettinad with full spice, and he had no regrets. We both had rice and garlic chive naan. 

I was so hungry and it was so good, I didn’t take any pictures. Wonderful food, though. Royal Spice in Troy does not miss, and their staff is super friendly. Then we went to Target, I forget why, and we also checked out a new-to-us store, Five Below. We both kind of loved it. We are what’s wrong with America today. I barely restrained myself from buying ten $5 himalayan salt lamps. $5!! My goodness.

We did take pictures kayaking, and it was lovely.

 

I somehow never realized before that pond weeds and water lily leaves turn color in the autumn, too.  We also hadn’t really thought about the dangers of falling into chilly water, though. Pretty dangerous, oops! We’ll be staying on land in cold weather until we get some better gear, so as not to court death and whatnot. 

MONDAY
Monday I truly do not remember what we ate. It was my turn to clean the kitchen, even, and it’s just not ringing a bell. Oh, I think it was tacos. 

TUESDAY
Oven fried chicken, baked potato, roast butternut squash, pomagranates

I guess I felt like I should cook at least one meal, so I did! Here’s my oven fried chicken recipe.

Jump to Recipe

I started the chicken soaking in egg and milk in the morning, and, following a premonition, pre-baked the potatoes and prepped the squash. I stabbed it all over with a fork and hacked off the ends and microwaved it for four minutes. Then it was easy to peel, so I peeled it, cut it, scooped out the seeds and pulp, and cut it into cubes. I spread them on a pan and drizzled them with hot honey, olive oil, salt, pepper and cardamom. 

Later in the afternoon, still trusting the premonition, I dredged the chicken in seasoned flour and cleaned the kitchen and then headed out for the afternoon driving. It’s not an interesting story, but it does involve two trips to Home Depot and one trip to the Home Depot bathroom and a leetle bit of screaming, and by the time I got home, boy was I glad I had prepped all that food. 

Cooked the chicken and threw the potatoes back in to warm them up, and then added the squash into the oven halfway through the cooking time. Cut up some pomegranates I forgot I had, and boop!

A really nice meal, and not even super late. 

WEDNESDAY
Chicken burgers, chips

Just chicken burgers and chips. Then Benny, Corrie and I made treats for their school parties on Thursday. I bought a bunch of pre-made rice krispie treats and heated up candy melts in the microwave, and we made 40 weird little Frankensteins. 

It took me 27 years, but I’m finally figuring out how to chill the heck out over kitchen projects with kids. Unfortunately, my new zen attitude has been paired with a type A child who thinks you’re yelling at her if you happen to blink in the wrong manner, but I suppose I had it coming. Anyway, everybody liked the Frankensteins. 

THURSDAY
Hot dogs, french fries

Thursday was, of course, Halloween. One thing I haven’t learned, in 27 years, is that it takes half an hour to get home from the school costume parade, so 4:00 at the soonest, and you really truly have to eat some kind of protein, and then trick or treating starts at 5:30, AND SO, it would be better not to plan costumes that involve a lot of face paint and spirit gum. Also, by about 5:10 I was plum out of zen attitude. So there was a wee bit of tension in the old Fisher household, but I, at least, ate a decent dinner 

by which I mean I bought hot dogs but not really hot dog buns, so much. 
And I DID get those kids out the door basically on time (we were supposed to meet someone, is why we had a specific time), and we ended up having a super fun night.

My older kids were totally in charge of their own costumes, and they did me proud with hot glue and spray paint, paper mache and tin foil. 

We had a Furiosa: 

A Frankenstein (she had a purple blazer and black shirt, but had already worn this ensemble twice on previous days, so she just decided to chillaxulate with the head for trick or treating) 

A very specific Robin, but I forget which one (and it’s a shame you can’t see her shoes, which were VERY detailed), paired with a very specific Batman

And then the costumes I made were Hell Boy

and *sigh* a vampire warrior princess, who had fang issues, backup fang issues, belt issues, cloak issues, bag issues, boot issues, and of course face paint issues, not to mention mother issues, but ENDED UP HAVING A REALLY GOOD TIME, whew. 

I must indulge myself and show a separate photo of her boots, which I thought were awesome.

Duct tape and disposable plastic plates, and they did not fall apart. 

When we got home, I did my best to convince the kids there had been a massive Laffy Taffy recall and I would be happy to help them dispose of it, but they were onto me. I would have fallen for that! 

FRIDAY
BLT’s 

Because it’s All Saints Day, and today we eat bacon! And I just now realized I forgot to buy rye bread. We let the kids stay home from school because some of the kids had a hike, which is bullshit, and some of the kids were tired from staying up and watching silly movies, which is just plain solid parenting. 

And me, I’m working at my desk which is my bed, setting up laptop and cords and pillows to make me sit up straight.
Now where is my phone?
Yanks away pillows and blankets and more pillows.
Ah, there it is!
Puts pillows back on top of phone. 
Tries to start laptop.
Won’t start.
Now where is my phone?

I also wondered why I was so cold, and then noticed I had my robe slung across my shoulder so I wouldn’t lose it. Like I said, it’s called “time management,” look it up. I did set an alarm so we don’t forget to go to Mass. Don’t forget! And then eat some bacon if you can. 

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Oven-fried chicken

so much easier than pan frying, and you still get that crisp skin and juicy meat

Ingredients

  • chicken parts (wings, drumsticks, thighs)
  • milk (enough to cover the chicken at least halfway up)
  • eggs (two eggs per cup of milk)
  • flour
  • your choice of seasonings (I usually use salt, pepper, garlic powder, cumin, paprika, and chili powder)
  • oil and butter for cooking

Instructions

  1. At least three hours before you start to cook, make an egg and milk mixture and salt it heavily, using two eggs per cup of milk, so there's enough to soak the chicken at least halfway up. Beat the eggs, add the milk, stir in salt, and let the chicken soak in this. This helps to make the chicken moist and tender.

  2. About 40 minutes before dinner, turn the oven to 425, and put a pan with sides into the oven. I use a 15"x21" sheet pan and I put about a cup of oil and one or two sticks of butter. Let the pan and the butter and oil heat up.

  3. While it is heating up, put a lot of flour in a bowl and add all your seasonings. Use more than you think is reasonable! Take the chicken parts out of the milk mixture and roll them around in the flour until they are coated on all sides.

  4. Lay the floured chicken in the hot pan, skin side down. Let it cook for 25 minutes.

  5. Flip the chicken over and cook for another 20 minutes.

  6. Check for doneness and serve immediately. It's also great cold.