It’s a long story, but the basic principle is, “If you’re gonna do something stupid, go big.” So we have an appointment to drive three hours and pick up a nice little puppy who happens to be a Great Dane/German Shepherd mix. I have zero experience with dogs, but my husband has owned tons of them. So I know he’ll have this guy completely under control in no time, no matter how big he gets.
” . . . and once you and I get ‘fetch’ down pat, I’m gonna train Mama how to use Photoshop, because this is just embarrassing.”
While we’re waiting for this little guy to be weaned, we’re thinking of names. All the kids except the baby (so that’s ages 4 to 15) contributed ideas. Here is our list, which may or may not be funny to anyone outside the family:
- Rosette
- Hammer Dammer
- Shambles
- Captain Bananas
- Sharkbait
- Bowie
- Minion
- Kirby
- Bucket
- Chickenbutt
- Bleah
- Woof
- Tesla
- Rufus
- Terminator
- Master of Darkness
- Rover
- Toby
- Cody
- Puckett
- Brainiac
- Broody
- Haddock
- Sharkface
- Tadpole
- Samwise
- Sam
- Ham
- Sebastian
- Hammy
- Short Round
- Lando
- Gandolf
- Dumbledore
- Voldemort
- Bananagram
- Moovie-doovie
- Grommit
- Yoshi
- Ramen
- Pop
- Popcorn
- Wii-wii
- Count Marshmallow
- Captain Flower
- Eye of Death
- Shatner
- Bum
- William
- Chips
- Stinker
- Gulliver
- Mama
- Nuffie
- Door-door
- Poison Dart Frog
- Eyeballs
- Piggie
- Snarkytreepig
- Farthead
- Yarp
- Narp
- Bongo
- Wolfie
- Mushroom Breath
- Patch
- Tenderheart
I feel like, no matter what we officially choose, it’s going to be Captain Bananas.