All that matters is what’s in your heart, right? Not so fast

Many Catholics will tell you that taking the Lord’s name in vain doesn’t mean using it as a curse word when someone cuts in front of you in traffic. Instead—they argue—taking the Lord’s name in vain is when you use it to justify ugly human behavior.

They will try to convince you that taking the Lord’s name in vain is when you declare you are pro-life—because humans are made in the image of God—but then you refer to immigrants as sub-human. They say that taking the Lord’s name in vain is when you hold a protest sign that says, “God hates gays,” or when you insist that real Catholic women never ever say  “no” to their husbands.

The truth is, of course, taking the Lord’s name in vain is both these things.

What we say ought to reflect what we believe, and what we believe ought to be shaped by what we say. We are what we do, and we are what we say. We are what we believe, and we are what we hold in our secret hearts that only the Lord can know.

If we are in the habit of being gentle and loving and generous and self-sacrificial toward others, then why would we not make the extra effort to also control our tongue? Why would we not use our voice to be gentle, loving, and generous towards our fellow humans and also towards God?

Using God’s name in vain is what you were taught in beginning catechism class; and it’s also something more subtle and more comprehensive.

Here’s another example of an updated understanding of virtue that corrects one error but makes a new one: It has become common for enlightened Catholics to insist that modesty is entirely an interior disposition and has nothing to do with the clothes we wear.

I understand how we got here  … Read the rest of my latest for The Catholic Weekly (and for context, recall that, in Australia, their hot season is just beginning!).

What’s for supper? Vol. 399: In which my flan is flerfect

Happy Friday! I have zero introductory quips, so let’s just get to it. Here’s what we ate this week: 

SATURDAY
Leftovers with burritos and fried rice

Busy-busy! Damien picked up Corrie from a sleepover and took the kids to the Pumpkin Festival while I went shopping, and then he picked up other kids and brought them to their friend’s house and took other friends from that house to their own house, and I don’t know what all. I was a little sad to miss the festival, but the appeal of just plain going home by myself was pretty overwhelming, even if it meant bringing the groceries in by myself like some kind of peasant. And then I put them away like a SANE PERSON, which is more than I can say for, nevermind. It’s fine. 

We had our now-traditional “leftover plus something frozen” Saturday meal — this week, frozen burritos. And a Frankenstein head, as you can see.

We turned out to have some leftover char siu as well as leftover rice, so I chopped it up and made some fried rice. 

I minced up a bunch of garlic, onion, and ginger, and browned it in sesame oil, then added a bunch of brown sugar and stirred that over the heat until the sugar was bubbly and darker. Then I put in the meat and rice, and dumped on a bunch of soy sauce and a little fish sauce. Couldn’t find the hoisin sauce. Then I stirred in scrambled eggs (I pre-scramble them) and some chopped scallions and there it was. 

Quite yummy. 

I think we watched Signs that night. Very solid scary movie, weird and interesting and perfectly paced.

SUNDAY
Domino’s

Sunday after Mass, we had been planning a trip to the apple orchard for weeks, but it was raining. But it really was the only day we could go, so we forged ahead, and the rain held off!

 

Clara and her boyfriend met us there, and we did all the things: Hayride, apple picking (and the timing was perfect. We got some HUGE wonderful fruit), petting zoo, donuts and hot cider. It started raining as we were finishing up, so we made a little side trip to Runnings, which is basically Redneck Walmart, and then met some more family members at my parents’ grave. 

Looks like everything I planted is dead except for one little stub of a rose bush, so I guess I’ll just start over. My sister and her husband built a truly spectacular reliquary for the St. Peter and St. Helena relics (which are still being restored and documented), and it was a strange and good visit. We all agreed it would be nice to meet again soon, maybe not in the rain in a graveyard, even. 

The kids wanted to make caramel apples when we got home, and I had bought those quick caramel sheets you just stretch over the apple and heat up.

I had a sudden memory of how I used to save those paper squares, because FREE PAPER. Feeling pretty rich these days. I buy my paper in the paper aisle!

I also started some caramel for the next day’s dessert, which I will explain in a moment. 

MONDAY
Chili con carne, fry bread, flan with mango and pecans

Monday we had a little lull because the kids had the day off for what our legislature apparently decided must legally be referred to as “Columbus Day” in official communications. If I had that much time on my hands, I’d . . . make even more chili for Indigenous Peoples Day than I actually did, which was quite a bit of chili. (We used to celebrate Columbus Day as Eat Italian Food day, but we transferred that to St. Joseph’s day, which makes as much sense as anything else.) 

Anyway, I made a big pot of chili. I basically followed this recipe from Recipe Tin Eats, except that I tripled it, and used two pounds of ground beef and one pound of ground turkey; I used two cans of kidney beans and one can of black beans; and I couldn’t find the paprika so I subbed chili powder. 

Turned out great. Pretty standard recipe, but there’s nothing wrong with that. 

I decided I wanted to make some kind of dessert, and I was 900% sure my kids would not eat anything made with hot blueberries and cornmeal, so I decided that flan was indigenous to somewhere (Spain if you use egg yolks, Mexico if you use the whole egg, and my backyard if you have a bunch of ducks), so flan it was. I honestly mostly wanted to use up eggs. 

I followed this recipe from The Spruce Eats, which I’ve made once before. Last time I made one big flan, but since then, I got my hands on a set of twelve ramekins, and could still find eleven of them! Not a bad record for this vicinity. 

Like I said, I made the caramel the night before. It’s just heating up and stirring white sugar until it’s liquidy, and then pouring it into the ramekins. I was so afraid of burning it, it took forever, but I didn’t burn it! I poured it into the ramekins, where it hardened very quickly, and then I just covered it and left it out overnight. 

Monday I made the custard and poured it on top of the caramel, and then poured water into the pan for a water bath.

Then you just bake it, let it cool, and then chill it for a few hours. BUT I FORGOT TO COVER IT. So much of the purpose of the water bath was defeated. Boo. But I got it into the fridge in plenty of time. 

I also decided I wanted to try something new to go along with the chili, so I made some fry bread, which many native peoples have a version of. I followed this very simple recipe and I don’t know what the heck happened, but it was really sloppy and sticky, really batter and not dough. So I kept adding and adding and adding flour until it was thick enough to handle, and fried that it hot oil. 

I continued adding flour as I went, and by the end, they were turning up more bread-like. 

The kids did not actually mind that the first several pieces were all crunchy and crinkly. I had mine as a side to the chili, but some of the kids put powdered sugar on theirs. 

No argument from me. 

Then it was flan time! You run a knife around the edge, then flip them over onto a plate and give them a shake or a tap, or maybe a thump, and they schlorp out onto the plate. The caramel has turned back into a syrup, and it pools on what is now the top, and runs down the sides. 

Nice, right? I was so pleased. I cut up a few mangoes and chopped up some leftover sugared pecans for the top, and oh, it was yummy. 

The custard was, as I was afraid, a little on the gummy side because it baked without a cover, but it wasn’t a disaster. Still rich and creamy, and a beautiful yellow with the duck eggs. 

I am unreasonably fond of custards, and would probably eat them every day if not for, well, various reasons. And it’s good to know I can totally make the caramel part ahead of time! 

TUESDAY
Shepherd’s pie

Tuesday I hustled to make a shepherd’s pie in the morning (and a shepherd’s pielet for Millie). I have a sort of vague recipe, which uses leftover meat, but obviously you can just cook the meat specifically for the pie. I’m sorry, I’m extremely tired and I’m probably babbling. Anyway, here’s the recipe:

Jump to Recipe

And here’s the pie: 

It should have been in the oven maybe eight more minutes, to the top could finish browning up. Oh well. It actually held together really nicely as individual pieces, but I kind of dropped it into the bowl, where it fell apart. 

Tuesday we had a frost in the morning

(not the first frost, but the first one that hit everything, not just shadowy spots), so I decided to go ahead and harvest that wild mob of gourds.

I dragged them in, washed and dried them, and counted them, and now they’re drying on the porch for a while, and pretty soon I’ll move them into the attic or something, to cure.

GUESS how many gourds. 

Sixty nine! And yes, when I told my husband how many there were, he said “nice.”

Well, they are nice! They will take several months to cure and completely dry on the inside, and then I can make all kinds of things with them. I’m thinking of vases and bowls, birdhouses, ocarinas, and maybe Christmas decorations, although they may not be ready by Christmas. 

I also got another six acorn squash and another four large pumpkins. And half a dozen eggplants that I forgot about and they look pretty wretched, so I think I’ll just throw them away. It’s going to be warm this weekend (high 60’s), so this may be my last chance to get my fall stuff in the ground. I have a bunch of striped red Gregeii tulips to intersperse with the daffodils that are pretty well-established in back, and then a bunch of random bulbs I got on clearance that I honestly might just put in planters, to simplify things. And I might get some garlic going, which I haven’t ever tried before. Goodness knows we do go through garlic. 

Oh, on Tuesday I also dragged myself to the doctor and had the immense pleasure of showing them what my inguinal hernia was up to, and we all decided it was time to show it who is boss (some stranger I just met who says she is a surgeon). So that’s something to look forward to.

WEDNESDAY
Muffalettish sandwiches, fries

Wednesday I had a nutty day. I was up all night and then slept late and basically rocketed into an interview, which actually turned out great. I really love doing these artist interviews! Then I had to shuffle a kid off to work and get a mammogram, stopped at the store for milk and whatnot, and while I was out, on the spur of the moment I ran to Supercuts, quickly googled “short wavy haircut,” and got me a short wavy haircut. 

Phew! I like it. Then picked up kids, dropped one off at catechism, picked up other kids, brought them home, went back for the catechism kid, and was very grateful to myself for planning a simple meal: SANDWICHES. And fries. 

I threw two cans of black olives, one jar of green olives, and one jar of kalamata olives, and a handful of banana peppers into the food processor, and then sloshed in a little red wine vinegar and olive oil. Sometimes I get fancier than that, but this was fine. 

I just had some prepackaged deli meats and cheeses and soft rolls, but gosh I was HUNGRY, and it tasted amazing. 

The fries also tasted amazing. The ketchup tasted amazing. I guess I was really hungry. 

Also really tired! Benny and Corrie were working on some kind of Tell-Tale Heart related project, and I fell asleep on the couch and Benny wrote “tired” on a little piece of paper and taped it to my face, so that was helpful. 

THURSDAY
Roast pork ribs, steamed broccoli, rice

Thursday was another crazy-go-nuts day, and I can’t even remember why. I considered various Asian options for dinner, and then just decided to go super kid friendly, because they’re tired, too. I made a bunch of rice in the Instant Pot with chicken broth instead of water, steamed a few bags of frozen broccoli, and roasted the pork ribs with just salt and pepper. 

Not a thing wrong with it. I had peach butter with my meat, but most of them had bottled BBQ sauce. 

One kid had PSAT, and Corrie had cub scouts in the evening, but it was (heavenly choir singing) Damien’s turn to take her; and then he also went and picked up Elijah. So I stayed home and had a little tantrum over how much TV the kids had been watching, so we all hung around and gloomily read books, and I of course fell asleep. But then I woke up insisted that we all drive over to the pond and see if we could see the comet. We saw Venus and decided that was impressive enough, because it was cold out. So we went home and I read a chapter of The Fellowship of the Ring to Corrie, and it was the part where Galadriel is tempted by the Ring, but passes the test. That was fun to read out loud!

And then I diminished and went to bed. 

FRIDAY
Quesadillas, chips and salsa

Yep, that’s the plan. Elijah and Damien are gonna go look at a used car after adoration, and at some point Corrie is going to get home from her field trip the Polar Caves, which I just realized I forgot to pay for. But I will. I’ll do everything, eventually. And make Halloween costumes!

I still plan to be beautiful and terrible as the Morning and the Night, fair as the Sea and the Sun and the Snow upon the Mountain, dreadful as the Storm and the Lightning, stronger than the foundations of the earth. But first I need to get some sleep. We all need to get some sleep. 

5 from 1 vote
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Leftover lamb shepherd's pie

This recipe uses lots of shortcuts and it is delicious.

Instructions

  1. Preheat the oven to 350.

  2. Prepare the mashed potatoes and set aside.

  3. Heat and drain the corn. (I heated mine up in beef broth for extra flavor.)

  4. In a saucepan, melt the butter and saute the onion and garlic until soft. Stir in pepper.

  5. Add the flour gradually, stirring with a fork, until it becomes a thick paste. Add in the cream and continue stirring until it is blended. Add in the cooked meat and stir in the Worcestershire sauce.

  6. Add enough broth until the meat mixture is the consistency you want.

  7. Grease a casserole dish and spread the meat mixture on the bottom. Spread the corn over the meat. Top with the mashed potatoes and spread it out to cover the corn. Use a fork to add texture to mashed potatoes, so they brown nicely.

  8. Cook for about forty minutes, until the top is lightly browned and the meat mixture is bubbly. (Finish browning under broiler if necessary.)

What’s for supper? Vol. 398: Who among us

Happy Friday! In haste! In haste! For today, like every day this week, is stuffed to the gills with appointments, phone calls, and driving. The good news is, I have gotten much better at writing down every last little thing on the calendar (including, as it turned out, some figments), so I knew it was gonna be that kind of week, and I planned the menu accordingly. 

(To new readers, welcome! I do a weekly dinner round-up on Fridays, so that’s what this is about.) 

Here’s what we had:

SATURDAY
Leftovers and mozzarella sticks

The new Saturday policy of leftovers from the previous week + a pot sweetener is going well. We had leftover hot dogs, leftover ham, leftover pulled pork, and frozen mozzarella sticks. 

Maybe you are thinking, dang, that is a heavy meal, but surely Simcha served a vegetable on the side to lighten things up, because she loves her family and cares about their cholesterol and whatnot. 

I appreciate the thought, but all I did was take a bag of salad out of the fridge and forget to put it on the table. 

SUNDAY
Oven fried chicken, mashed potatoes, coleslaw, roast carrots

Sunday I figured it would be the last day for being home all day, and I got super cook-y and started some chicken soaking in milk and egg in the morning. Here is my recipe for oven fried chicken:

Jump to Recipe

I made a few packages of instant mashed potatoes, even though I totally had time to make the from scratch.

And that’s it. I’ve crossed the line, and I’m now fully an instant mashed potatoes person. For a while I was in the “it’s a surprisingly decent substitute if you’re pressed for time” camp, and I dallied in the realms of “well, for some dishes, for some reason, it actually just hits better” for a while, but I’m fully converted now. I know all about using the right kind of potato and heaping on the butter and putting it all through a ricer. Sure, sure, that makes really good mashed potatoes. But have you considered that instant mashed potatoes make you feel like you’re six years old and just got in from sledding down the big hill all recess and there are hot instant mashed potatoes for lunch? 

I also found a half cabbage in the fridge, and made some quick coleslaw (shredded cabbage and a few shredded carrots, and mayo with cider vinegar, a little sugar, and lots of pepper) that nobody ate, and then I tried a new recipe with carrots: This glazed carrot recipe from RecipeTinEats. It was undeniably easy, and I liked how they turned out and so did everybody else; but they definitely did not get that glossy, caramelized glaze like Nagi’s did. They were just roasted and faintly sweet. I dunno. I’ll probably make them again, because we always have carrots in the house, but it didn’t knock my socks off. 

Joke’s on them: I was not wearing socks. Because I can’t find them. 

For the chicken, I was very heavy handed with the seasoning (I used salt, pepper, cumin, chili powder, and garlic powder) and Damien really liked it, so I’ll probably do it that way from now on. I really love oven fried chicken. It’s dead simple and it turns out great every time, as long as you leave enough time. 

So a very tasty meal overall. 

While the kitchen was still wrecked up, I started some hunks of pork marinating for Monday’s dinner. 

MONDAY
Char siu, rice, sesame broccoli 

I again went to RecipeTinEats for her char siu recipe.  The meat was marinating in a ziplock bag that looked absolutely ghastly, because I used an entire bottle of red food coloring in the marinade. You cook the meat at a low temp in the oven and save the marinade, add a little more honey and thicken it up a bit

and then use that to baste the meat a few times over the next hour and a half or so. 

It was good! Looked great, flavor was perfect. It was, to my dismay, pretty dang dry, though.

(I will admit that I just grabbed some random hunk of pork, and it wasn’t one of the cuts she advised, so maybe that made a difference.) I loved the flavors, though, so I’ll probably make this again, but cover it with tinfoil when I cook it, and maybe fill the roasting pan with water. 

I made a pot of rice in the Instant Pot and roasted some broccoli with soy sauce, sesame oil, and pepper

Jump to Recipe

but not sesame seeds, because I can find my sesame seeds, but only when I don’t need them

and it was a tasty meal. If a little dry.

Who among us. 

I was thinking I would use the leftover meat in fried rice or something later, but there was no leftover, so it can’t have been that bad. 

TUESDAY
Spaghetti with sausage

Tuesday we had three appointments in three different towns at the same time, and only one car still (Damien ordered the parts long ago, but they got lost in New Jersey or something. Who among us), so I cancelled one, and then there was an insurance snafu with the other, and then the third one turned out to be . . . imaginary? I had written “S surgery 11” but this seems to have been a figment of my imagination, and no one actually needed to be surged upon. So the car parts did come, though, and he has been working at drilling out stripped, frozen old screws, and we had spaghetti with jarred sauce and Italian sausages, and that’s-a my story. 

I think it was Tuesday that Damien finished fixing my car. Very exciting. I’ve been driving his car, which not only complicates our schedule since we have to take turns leaving the house, but also it is held together with duct tape, the windows don’t open, and you have to park very strategically, because you may randomly find yourself turning the wheels without any mechanical assistance except the power of your flabby little arms, and the car weighs [quickly googles it] ah yes, 7,000 pounds. So it was pretty neat to be back in my nimble, sporty little 2010 Honda Odyssey. 

He also changed my oil and reset my radio, because he loves me.

WEDNESDAY
Chicken caprese burgers, vegetables and dip, random bags of snacks

Wednesday, there was another phantom medical appointment on the calendar, which caused some passing consternation. But Corrie started Catechesis of the Good shepherd, and that was real! Such good stuff. 

We had frozen chicken burgers on rolls with tomatoes, basil, and some fairly nice mozzarella, olive oil, balsamic vinegar, salt and pepper, and I cut up a ton of vegetables, and then proceeded to render them invisible to the family by also putting out a bunch of bags of old chips and onion rings and stuff. 

I myself did not eat any of the vegetables. I just put them in the picture to show off. I ate vegetables for lunch! Get off my case! 

THURSDAY
Pizza

Thursday it would be hard for me to describe, except that Damien handled the big, complex, out-of-town appointment, and I was still so tired by 7:00, I lost a game of tic tac toe to Corrie.  She had put two X’s in a line, but I just didn’t see it coming. She also had her second den meeting for Cub Scouts, and when I went to pick her up, the kids were playing hide and seek in the pitch dark with flashlights, and I think it was the most fun I have ever seen six kids have. 

I made three pizzas very quickly indeed: One plain, one pepperoni, and one with black olive and leftover tomatoes and basil.

The sauce was leftover from the spaghetti, and I was intending to use the leftover sausages on the pizza, but there weren’t any! They complained about the sausages when I served them, but then they ate them all. I guess that’s better than complimenting them and then not eating them. 

FRIDAY
Tuna boats, cheezy weezies

The kids requested tuna sandwiches, but I think Damien may pick up some supermarket sushi for the two of us. We have an absolute action-packed weekend coming up (sleepover, Pumpkin Festival, apple picking, grave visiting, possible reliquary pick-up) and I think fortifying ourselves with cheap sushi is warranted. 

Oh, I forgot, after Katie in the comments identified the cookbook I vaguely remembered from my childhood,

I tracked down and ordered a copy, and turned it over to Corrie. Some of the recipes are truly appalling, but a few of them are solid, and it should keep her busy for a while. Remind me to update on that! Something really lovely about kids excited to cook. 

I will sign off with this comment that I included in my folder of food photos, not sure why. 

Tag yourself! I’m mostly chagrined skeleton, but occasionally cat who has to eat on the bathroom counter because the freaking dog isn’t satisfied with his own food. I would also like to note that I treated myself to a new shower curtain, and I had some reservations because it’s see-through, and I wasn’t sure if some children of a certain tween persuasion mightn’t find that too revealing; but I had forgotten that intense modesty often hits right when you’re also still pretty scared of monsters creeping up on you when you’re taking a shower.

Who among us. 

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Oven-fried chicken

so much easier than pan frying, and you still get that crisp skin and juicy meat

Ingredients

  • chicken parts (wings, drumsticks, thighs)
  • milk (enough to cover the chicken at least halfway up)
  • eggs (two eggs per cup of milk)
  • flour
  • your choice of seasonings (I usually use salt, pepper, garlic powder, cumin, paprika, and chili powder)
  • oil and butter for cooking

Instructions

  1. At least three hours before you start to cook, make an egg and milk mixture and salt it heavily, using two eggs per cup of milk, so there's enough to soak the chicken at least halfway up. Beat the eggs, add the milk, stir in salt, and let the chicken soak in this. This helps to make the chicken moist and tender.

  2. About 40 minutes before dinner, turn the oven to 425, and put a pan with sides into the oven. I use a 15"x21" sheet pan and I put about a cup of oil and one or two sticks of butter. Let the pan and the butter and oil heat up.

  3. While it is heating up, put a lot of flour in a bowl and add all your seasonings. Use more than you think is reasonable! Take the chicken parts out of the milk mixture and roll them around in the flour until they are coated on all sides.

  4. Lay the floured chicken in the hot pan, skin side down. Let it cook for 25 minutes.

  5. Flip the chicken over and cook for another 20 minutes.

  6. Check for doneness and serve immediately. It's also great cold.

 

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Sesame broccoli

Ingredients

  • broccoli spears
  • sesame seeds
  • sesame oil
  • soy sauce

Instructions

  1. Preheat broiler to high.

    Toss broccoli spears with sesame oil. 

    Spread in shallow pan. Drizzle with soy sauce and sprinkle with sesame seeds

    Broil for six minutes or longer, until broccoli is slightly charred. 

I’m tired of throwing my vote away, so I’m voting ASP

For most of my voting life, people have been urging me to vote third party. The two-party system is broken, they say, and we have to send a message that we’re not happy with our flawed choices. It’s degrading to make ourselves vote for one or the other of these absurdly bad candidates, they say. We’re sending a signal that we’re ready for a change. 

I have always had some sympathy for this argument. As I’ve said several times, I can’t remember the last time I actually voted for someone. It’s always been a “hold your nose and check the box for the one who will do the least damage” kind of situation. I felt like it would be nice to stand on my principles and vote third party, but this current election is just too important. The stakes are too high, and I really can’t afford the luxury of throwing away my vote. 

Today I asked myself: What have I been doing, then? 

Here’s my voting record, since people seem to care: 

1992: George H.W. Bush
1996: Bob Dole
2000: George W. Bush
2004: George W. Bush
2008: John McCain
2012: Mitt Romney
2016: Hillary Clinton
2020: Joe Biden

I was never excited about any of the republicans I voted for, but when Trump came along, I held my nose so hard I almost broke it, voting for Hillary so she could stop him. She lost. I held my nose and voted for Biden in 2020, and he won. And I’ve spent the last few weeks gloomily preparing myself to vote for Kamala Harris, because while I don’t exactly hope she wins, I sure don’t want Trump to win. Don’t want to throw my vote away. 

Then I asked myself, Have I not been throwing my vote away? I don’t even mean that my person doesn’t win every time. I mean that even when I win, I lose. Biden didn’t stop Trumpism at all, and he didn’t stop Trump himself for long. (That’s not entirely Biden’s fault, but I’m hard pressed to see how he’s earned credit for any wins, either.)

And every time I vote this way, I stray a little further from even understanding clearly what I believe, or from feeling like it’s important, because my standards keep shifting out of sheer self-preservation. You have to change your standards if you don’t want to go insane. You have to hold your nose and vote for the lesser of two evils, right? 

But we have noses for a reason. They’re a gift from God to deter us from consuming things that will hurt us. Plug your nose long enough, you forget what noses are for. 

Where are we now? Nobody feels any pressure to represent me in any way. Both side perpetually crap on me and then stand back and wait for a thank-you. Even when I do my duty and stop the Great Evil from landing, all it does it put more wind in its sails. If anything, Trumpism, with its bloodthirsty strutting imbecility is more pervasive and more mainstreamed than it was four or eight years ago. Doing my duty and voting for Biden didn’t help. (Voting for Trump also wouldn’t have helped, if you think I’m suggesting some kind of “Let the worst happen and let people learn from their mistakes” strategy.)

When the republicans endorse something I support, they do it in such a backwards, revolting way that I want to kick my own ass for being in the same room with them; and when the democrats endorse something I support, they do it so limply and incompetently that I can barely bring myself to look at them. And then they both spend the rest of their time doing dangerous and depraved things that I hate. 

Maybe the worst thing of all, I’m used to it. I no longer expect anything different.

I have been throwing my vote away. 

I don’t want to do it anymore! Before the next president is sworn in, I’ll be fifty years old, and I’m sick to death of being told I must do things that I know are stupid and wrong, and that I don’t think will work. I’m tired of it. I don’t want to do it anymore.

So, I’m voting American Solidarity Party. They seem to be aligned with Catholic social teaching, including in ways that will annoy both democrats and republicans. They’re not libertarians, whose platform always gets distilled down to weed and underage girls. They’re nowhere near as flaky and unprofessional as they were when they first appeared (and their logo is better, too). I can’t think of a single reason not to vote for them, so that’s what I’m going to do. 

People keep lamenting how polarized the country has become, and then they go ahead and say, “Well, I have to vote this way or that way, because these are the choices in front of me.” But where do those choices come from? They come from us, from how we vote. Keep doing something that you can clearly see isn’t working, and it really does become your fault. And if you want to argue that individual voters don’t really make a difference, then you’re just arguing against voting (which is also something I considered). 

But I’ll say it again: I hate where we are, and I see very clearly that the way I’ve been voting has helped get us here. The left doesn’t care about me, the right doesn’t care about me, and voting to stop the left or the right doesn’t work. How I’ve voting has not served me at all. I am all done with being told I must do things that work against me. This time, I’m going to walk out of the voting booth feeling like a human being instead of a used tissue.  

Will it change things? Will we ever have a truly competitive third party who even goes so far as to be invited to debates, never mind have a shot at winning the presidency? Who knows? Not this election, or any of the next several elections.

But besides voting, the other thing I have on my calendar for this fall is to plant bulbs. Crouch there in the cold, dig a little hole, bury the bulb, and walk away. We do thankless work now so that good may possibly come of it later. I wish a massive group of people had started voting third party back in 1992, to break the back of the two party system; but the next best thing is to start doing it now. 

And maybe someday, someone who isn’t like Harris and isn’t like Trump will run and win. Maybe! Don’t tell me, in 2024, that such a thing could never happen. The last decade has been one thing that could never happen after another, happening.

For the very first time, I am going to vote in a way that lets me feel a little bit of hope for the future, and brings me peace for now. I’m not throwing my vote away. I’m burying it, and maybe at some point it will even bloom. 

Image: solidarity-party.org, via wikipedia, Fair use 

Note: As you no doubt noticed, I screwed up the election timelines! Sorry about that. What can I say, I was writing fast. 

On hearing the word

Do you have a priest with a non-American accent? We’ve had several in our little parish over the years. That’s not surprising, even in our very white, very homogeneous region, because according to a recent study, about a quarter of seminarians in the United States are foreign-born. 

When Catholics hear a thick accent coming from the pulpit, they tend to respond in one of two extremes: either with a cranky dismissal, with undertones of “Why don’t these people go back where they came from?” or else with a warm, self-congratulatory welcome of ethnic diversity — which lasts until the own-back-patterns discover this new priest doesn’t omit the bracketed section for shorter reading. 

But I heard a new take the other day, a rather bracing one for native-born Americans like me.

Father Ryan Hildebrand wrote on X: “‘I can’t understand my foreign priest’s accent!’ Instead of belittling you for not sending your sons to seminary (like I normally would), I’ll give you a helpful tip: Go to YouTube. Pull up BBC [his country of origin]. Watch it for a few minutes each day. That’ll help.”

He’s right, it would! It really is the kind of thing you can get better at with practice.

I loved the advice itself; and I loved the implication that a priest’s hard-to-understand accent is a problem for the listener to solve, and not only for the priest or the pastor or someone else. It’s certainly not something we should be mad about, because a foreign accent is the sign that someone has been brave and persevering, and willing to do hard things to serve God and us. But it’s also not something we should be passively, contentedly tolerant of, without trying to make the situation better. It’s something we should work on, from our end.

The Word — every word, but especially the Word of God — is meant to be heard and understood, and we should do what we can to help that happen.

How many problems in the world actually have a simple, at least partial solution, but it never occurs to us to discover it, because we don’t consider the problem ours to solve? Probably about as many problems as we drive ourselves crazy trying to solve, even though they’re not our responsibility or not under our control.

Sometimes the best way to help the Word be understood is to get out of the way.

Here is another scenario … Read the rest of my latest for Our Sunday Visitor.

Image: Christus met sterren in de hand (1899) Odilon Redon, public domain (creative commons)

 

What else can Trump do to persuade Catholics he’s on their side?

American Catholic voters, the cheapest of cheap dates, went absolutely bananas the other day on Michaelmas when someone on Donald Trump’s social media team posted the prayer to St Michael.   

Because I am slightly more sentient than a banana myself, I feel qualified to explain this phenomenon: This is called “pandering.” It is what you do when you are equal parts ignorant of and contemptuous toward something (like how Trump is ignorant of and contemptuous toward the Catholic faith) but you know that you need those people to vote for you, and you know a lot of them are absurdly gullible and desperate for affirmation. So you throw them a scrap and watch them scramble.  

On the same day the prayer made a splash on Facebook and X, Trump himself made a remark in person wherein he sounded more like his old familiar self, not praying humbly as in the St Michael prayer, but longing for “one really violent day” in which police could get “extraordinarily rough” against shoplifters who are allegedly swarming over our fair country.   

Trump himself, of course, is notorious for walking away without paying for what he takes; in his personal life and in his campaign; and despite the fear and frenzy he habitually tries to whip up—”[P]olice aren’t allowed to do their job. They’re told if you do anything, you’re going to lose your pension. You’re going to lose your family, your house, your car.”—both violent and property crimes (like the theft Trump constantly complains about) have declined dramatically across the entire country.   

But he shared a prayer! And on Mary’s birthday, he shared a picture of Our Lady of Guadalupe! And the two failed assassination attempts took place on the feast days of Our Lady of Sorrows, and also on the Feast of St Henry, which, y’know, is probably also significant somehow if you have eyes to see! And Melania is Catholic! 

So very Catholic. 

As a Catholic, that’s all the evidence anyone could need. Sure, Trump’s no angel, but God’s been workin’ on his heart, and we’re clearly mere moments away from the best conversion you people have ever seen, a really big, beautiful conversion; you won’t believe your eyes. Not even the late, great Hannibal Lecter could have a conversion like this.   

Maybe you’re still somehow unpersuaded by the overwhelming evidence that Trump is doing the work of God. Maybe you’re still a tad skeptical that there is some kind of sincere searching going on in his soul.  

Frankly, I’m sad for you. It must be hard to live in such a cynical world when you can’t even see what’s so plainly right before your eyes. What would it take to make you see the burgeoning grace at work inside this happy warrior? What more could this lion of God do to melt your hearts of stone and show you who he really is? 

I have a few ideas … Read the rest of my latest for The Catholic Weekly. 

Image source 

What’s for supper? Vol. 397: Sonny’s revenge

Happy Friday!  I’m feeling so good because I just exercised. I regret to inform you that this is a thing. (And I am grateful I have the time and health to be able to exercise! That’s not something everyone has.) 

I did one of Alba Avella’s 30-minute yoga power flows on YouTube. It starts slow, and you don’t ever move fast, but I was schvitzing by the end, let me tell you. 

And now let me tell you what we ate this week!

SATURDAY
Hot dogs and leftovers

It was pretty great when they started selling a store brand version of those natural casing hot dogs. Damien and I really like hot dogs, but our kids don’t! Isn’t that weird? Is this a generational thing? Anyway we occasionally foist hot dogs on them. 

We also had leftover chicken soup with orzo, leftover risotto, and leftover garlic cinnamon roast chicken, from last week. 

(I have given up clearing the table for dinner. If people want a table that doesn’t have their crap all over it, they can go right ahead.)

The new refrigerator system is working out really well! It’s simple enough that the kids can clearly tell where things go, but organized enough that it’s really making a difference to me. I’ve also instituted a ruthless throw-away policy for food. I make one attempt to serve it as leftovers, and then it goes in the trash. This has always been the plan, but now it’s a policy.

Anyway, I know it’s only been a little over a week, but that’s more than enough time for a new system to go completely to hell, and that hasn’t happened yet.

SUNDAY
Pulled pork, tater tots, mashed acorn squash, collard greens

Sunday I was gonna do an easy, literally peasy meal of ham, peas, and mashed potatoes, but a kid had a friend over, and it turned out I only had three potatoes in the house. I floated the idea of making soup and muffins, but was informed that being invited over for dinner and then being served soup was not . . . rizzly, or whatever. Very un-totes m’goats. I don’t know what I’m saying. 

So I made pulled pork with this nice, easy recipe

Jump to Recipe

which I did in the Instant Pot, but you could also do in the oven or slow cooker, if you give it long enough. I served it with potato rolls, but I just had mine over tater tots with red onions. I do like food that comes in heaps. 

For sides, I roasted another acorn squash from the garden, with olive oil and salt, and then mashed it with brown sugar and powdered ginger. And I gathered up one of the last bunches of collard greens from the garden (there’s a lot left, actually, but most of it has been pretty ravaged by slugs) and cooked them on the stovetop, more or less following this recipe, but decreasing the liquid smoke. 

Dang, it was a good meal. I think I was the one who ate the collards, and I think only one other person ate the squash, but I expected that, so I don’t make giant vats of food this time. I can learn! 

MONDAY
Ham, peas, mashed potatoes

Monday I don’t even remember what happened, but I didn’t get home until like 5 PM. The perfect day for already-cooked ham, frozen peas, and instant mashed potatoes!

It’s such a self-explanatory meal, I don’t have anything to say, except that you can carve up a pre-cooked ham before putting it in the oven, and it heats up much faster. 

After dinner, the kids went out back to finally pick pumpkins. I’ve been worried they’re going to get mushy or cracked if they stay on the vine too long, and one of them — the biggest one, sadly — did have a big rotten spot. So the ducks got that one. 

We did find fifteen nice intact ones, though, good and orange and decently sized. 

There are still about six on the vine, still partially green. This has probably been the most satisfying garden experience I’ve ever had! Most definitely saving the seeds from this batch and doing it again next year. 

The last thing to harvest will be dozens of useless gourds. I wouldn’t classify that as “satisfying,” exactly, but it sure is a lot of gourds. 

I should probably mention that we have sad news about EJ. He got a foot injury some time ago, and we tried to treat it in various ways, and he kept looking like he was getting better for a while, and keeping up with the group and enjoying life even though he had been supplanted by Coin as the leader; but then he’d lose ground again. This happened a few times, but the other day it became pretty clear that he was at the end of the road, so Damien had to put him down. The kids fed him some peas and stroked his head and said their goodbyes first. Poor EJ. He was my favorite duck. Always an adventurer, but not a monster. I do think it’s better to have just one male in the flock, and Coin has calmed down a bit and is less of an a-hole lately. But we will miss EJ the valiant. He was so dumb, but he was a good boy.  

Ah, well. 

TUESDAY
Roast beef salad with pears, feta, and candied pecans

Oh, I love this meal. It was either top or bottom round roast that was on sale, so I bought two good-sized hunks. I took one and really crusted it with lots of salt and pepper, and then seared it in very hot oil, along with several cloves of garlic.

Then I covered it with tinfoil and put it in a 350 oven for about forty minutes. We got distracted and it got a little overdone, but it was still yummy. 

I sliced it up and served it with salad greens, candied pecans, feta cheese, diced red onion, homemade croutons, and sliced pears. 

I’m always surprised at how quick it is to candy nuts. I cannot for the life of me find the recipe I followed, but it was SO simple.  Obviously you can get fancy and add all kinds of spices, or do an egg white thing to give the nuts extra texture, but the one I did was just heat up some brown sugar and water in a pan and heat it up until it’s bubbly, add the nuts, and cook and stir them until they’re coated. Maybe there was some butter in there? Then spread them out on parchment paper and let them cool and harden for a few hours. 

I added a little chili powder, but it turned out not to be enough to taste. 

Anyway they tasted great and it was an unexpected treat to dress up the salad. 

Yum yum. 

WEDNESDAY
Beef barley soup, pumpkin muffins

Wednesday I used the other hunk of beef and made soup. 

Jump to Recipe

I forgot to buy mushrooms, and we didn’t have wine in the house, but it still turned out lovely. 

While it was simmering, I made a batch of pumpkin muffin batter

Jump to Recipe

and was congratulating myself on how well I had distributed the batter into the 24 muffin tins. It came out so tidy and exactly even. See?

Oh wait, this is actually a photo of raw muffins that I foolishly set on a stool while I went to write a quick email, and when I got back, SOMEONE, perhaps someone about the height of a large boxer, had licked the nine most reachable muffins on two sides of the pan. 

I think he was mad because I did this to him earlier

He’s not a naughty dog, but he has his limits. 

So I just baked the muffins anyway, and threw out the nine with obvious tongue marks on them, because it was easier to remove them when they were baked!

The remaining muffins turned out nice, cozy and tender

and it was a very pleasant meal for a chilly day.

I actually wish I had cut the meat into smaller pieces. I thought I was making it kind of lavish, with big pieces of meat, since I had more meat than I usually do; but it actually would have been better if they had been smaller. Still good! Just less balanced. 

Wednesday I also finally got around to making applesauce out of the apples we picked off Marvin. 

They’re pretty poor apples, as you can see, because I don’t do even one single thing to take care of this tree. But I usually make a batch of applesauce, by quartering the apples and setting them to simmer in a pot for a few hours with a cup of water or so. Then when they get mushy, I run them (cores and peels and all) through a food mill and add a little cinnamon, and sugar if necessary to the applesauce that comes through. 

This year I forgot what I was doing and burned it. Very sad! We’ll have to make applesauce when we go apple picking, because nothing beats homemade applesauce. 

THURSDAY
Regular tacos

Thursday Corrie had Cub Scouts at 5:30, so I cooked up some taco meat in the morning and Damien heated it up for the rest of the family while we were out. I was a little annoyed because I couldn’t find cumin, and I know I have cumin. I always have cumin. I was so miffed about not being able to find it that I forgot to add any salt, and that turned out to make much more of a difference than missing cumin! What do you know about that. What an amazing story. 

FRIDAY
Waffle iron grilled cheese, tomato soup

I am going to try making the grilled cheese in the waffle iron, but if they don’t like it, I can easily just do the rest on the stovetop as usual. 

It will be just canned tomato soup. I think the kids actually prefer it to my homemade tomato soup, which I understand. I enjoy and appreciate more nuanced, sophisticated meals made from scratch with fresh ingredients, but I also very clearly remember being a kid and wanting things to taste exactly the same every single time, and for that taste to be either sweet or salty, and for it not to have any damn chunks in it. Grown ups are always putting chunks of things in food, and it’s tiresome. I mean I remember how tiresome it feels, even as I actively put chunks in food.

I do have a can of those crunchy fried onions if anyone wants to sprinkle them on top of the soup. Crunchy is different from chunky! And I did bring in my big pots of basil, hoping to keep them going over the winter. So perhaps a little sprinkle of little basil leaves. If desired. 

When I was little, we had this cookbook of recipes kids could make without help, and the only one I remember is a can of condensed tomato soup heated up without water, but with shredded cheddar cheese that you melt into the soup to make a thick sauce. You pour this over rye toast, and enjoy.

If anyone can think what this cookbook might possibly be, I’d love to know! I can’t remember any other recipes from it, but I think it had stylized pictures of kids with chef’s hats, and possibly a chic black cat, on the cover. Very much in this mode:

It must have been from the 60’s or 70’s. I did spend some time in this searchable collection of vintage cookbooks and didn’t see it, but hoo boy there are some doozies. 

And that’s it for the week! Headed to adoration, will pray for all you cheese bags.

Print

Clovey pulled pork

Ingredients

  • fatty hunk of pork
  • salt and pepper
  • oil for browning
  • 1 cup apple cider vinegar
  • 2/3 cup apple juice
  • 3 jalapeños with tops removed, seeds and membranes intact
  • 1 onion, quartered
  • 2 Tbsp cumin
  • 1 tsp red pepper flakes
  • 2 tsp ground cloves

Instructions

  1. Cut pork into hunks. Season heavily with salt and pepper.

  2. Heat oil in heavy pot and brown pork on all sides.

  3. Move browned pork into Instant Pot or slow cooker or dutch oven. Add all the other ingredients. Cover and cook slowly for at least six hours.

  4. When pork is tender, shred.

 

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Beef barley soup (Instant Pot or stovetop)

Makes about a gallon of lovely soup

Ingredients

  • olive oil
  • 1 medium onion or red onion, diced
  • 1 Tbsp minced garlic
  • 3-4 medium carrots, peeled and diced
  • 2-3 lbs beef, cubed
  • 16 oz mushrooms, trimmed and sliced
  • 6 cups beef bouillon
  • 1 cup merlot or other red wine
  • 29 oz canned diced tomatoes (fire roasted is nice) with juice
  • 1 cup uncooked barley
  • salt and pepper

Instructions

  1. Heat the oil in a heavy pot. If using Instant Pot, choose "saute." Add the minced garlic, diced onion, and diced carrot. Cook, stirring frequently, until the onions and carrots are softened. 


  2. Add the cubes of beef and cook until slightly browned.

  3. Add the canned tomatoes with their juice, the beef broth, and the merlot, plus 3 cups of water. Stir and add the mushrooms and barley. 

  4. If cooking on stovetop, cover loosely and let simmer for several hours. If using Instant Pot, close top, close valve, and set to high pressure for 30 minutes. 

  5. Before serving, add pepper to taste. Salt if necessary. 

 

Print

Pumpkin quick bread or muffins

Makes 2 loaves or 18+ muffins

Ingredients

  • 30 oz canned pumpkin puree
  • 4 eggs
  • 1 cup veg or canola oil
  • 1.5 cups sugar
  • 3.5 cups flour
  • 2 tsp baking soda
  • 1.5 tsp salt
  • 1 tsp cinnamon
  • 1 tsp nutmeg
  • 1/2 tsp ground cloves
  • 1/4 tsp ground ginger
  • oats, wheat germ, turbinado sugar, chopped dates, almonds, raisins, etc. optional

Instructions

  1. Preheat oven to 350. Butter two loaf pans or butter or line 18 muffin tins.

  2. In a large bowl, mix together dry ingredients except for sugar.

  3. In a separate bowl, mix together wet ingredients and sugar. Stir wet mixture into dry mixture and mix just to blend. 

  4. Optional: add toppings or stir-ins of your choice. 

  5. Spoon batter into pans or tins. Bake about 25 minutes for muffins, about 40 minutes for loaves. 

 

 

What’s for supper? Vol. 396: Season of mists and mellow soupfulness

Happy Friday! I was looking through my camera roll for this week’s food pics, and came across this image:

and smiled quietly to myself. Then I thought if I shared it, I really need to hunt up the source, so I searched for it on Facebook, which helpfully supplied this as the only hit:

I guess Facebook never heard of snitches get stitches. 

Alternate joke: 
. . .nah, never mind, I was gonna do a thing about misusing substances while shouting “I refute it thus!” and then breaking your foot, but in fact college was just too long ago. 
 
(But actually the source is this funny lady on Instagram.) 

Speaking of substance, I have lost six pounds in the last two weeks, by more or less adhering to the eating plan I outlined here. I’ve been up and down enough times to know that things could go south (or north, I guess) at any point, either because I sabotage myself or something outside my control happens; but dammit, I did lose six pounds. Usually I can lose four pounds and it doesn’t mean anything, but six pounds is enough to get my attention. 

My secret weapon is neither GLP-1 nor cocaine, but gum. Because my big problem, when I’m trying to lose weight, is not really that I get hungry; it’s that my mouth gets lonely. So I give it some gum, and it works. This is humiliating for me because I’ve spent my entire adult life being absolutely horrible to people for chewing gum in my presence. Oh well. I’m just trying not to be an absolute cow about it, and if anyone wants me to apologize, I will. 

Okay, that’s enough of that! Here is how we made our mouths less lonely this week: 

SATURDAY
Salmon tacos or mac and cheese

I had already defrosted some salmon filets the previous day, but we had…something else, I don’t even remember.It was not a week worth remembering, as I recall.  But I’m trying really hard to waste less food, so I patted the filets dry and sprinkled them with .. . I think salt and cayenne pepper? I don’t remember. Then I heated up a pan super hot with a layer of olive oil, and put them salmon on, skin down. I let it cook for probably four minutes and then flipped it over and cooked it for just another minute or so. Then I squeezed a lime over it. Turned out really nice! Not dry.

I only made four pieces because the kids that were home are not fish lovers. 

I made a bowl of guacamole and shredded up some cabbage, which I set out like this and nobody said a thing about it

This is top tier food humor, but my talent is wasted. 

So we just had really simple little tacos with the salmon, cabbage, and guac, with more lime

Nice. 

SUNDAY
Cinnamon garlic chicken, roast squash and Brussels sprouts, hobbit bread; Rosemary olive oil cake with homemade ice cream

Sunday was Clara’s birthday, and she did the baking at her apartment and then brought it over here to finish. So I made the garlic cinnamon chicken I make at Passover 

Jump to Recipe

and a big tray of roast butternut squash and Brussels sprouts. I drizzled them with olive oil and hot honey and sprinkled them with salt and pepper, and broiled them. Dinner ended up quite a bit later than expected, so I ended up scraping them into a pan and keeping them warm under tinfoil, but this wasn’t a bad thing! Just a bit more medey’d than usual. 

Clara brought a giant, pneumatic loaf of bread to bake, which turned out lovely, very tender

and she baked the olive oil rosemary cake from Parsley and Icing. She put rosewater in the frosting instead of vanilla, and she decorated it with phlox blossoms. 

NOTE: Perennial phlox is edible, but annual phlox is not!!!! Decorate accordingly, depending on whose birthday it is and whether you would like them to have more. 

But it was such a lovely cake, and a great texture. 

I was very pleased with myself because, a few months ago, I found a KitchenAid stand mixer on FB Marketplace for an amazing price. I believe it’s from the 90’s and works great, and it’s GREEN. 

 

Well-received, as you can see, and obviously she will put it to good use! My own KitchenAid was a wedding present in 1997, and it was refurbished then, and it’s still going strong. A few years ago it needed oiling, and Damien put a new cord on it this year, but other than that, it’s been working away with zero problems. If you are thinking of getting a KitchenAid, I highly recommend a used one.

I went down a bit of a rabbit hole trying to figure out when the decline that everyone is sad about actually happened, and it’s really hard to say. Some people are saying the newer models have a sacrificial gear that’s designed to break, to spare the engine, and it’s actually a cheap fix; but others are saying the whole design got nickeled and dimed and is just not the workhoree it once was. So, that was a paragraph without any actual information in it, sorry. Anyway, at very least, a used one will be way cheaper. My eyes really bugged out when I saw the price tag for a new machine! 

Anyway, after dinner and presents, we had such a nice, happy evening, just sitting around yakking. Damien and I kind of sat back and let the kids talk, and it really warmed my heart to listen to them just enjoying each other’s company, talking about movies and candy and whatever. I sure like my kids. 

Oh, I forgot about the ice cream! I made both kinds in the morning, which is a bit of a gamble because some ice creams don’t firm up enough in a few hours. They were on the soft side, but still scoopable. 

I did one with almond, and I just did the Ben and Jerry’s sweet cream base (2 eggs, 3/4 cup sugar, 2 cups of heavy cream, one cup of milk) and I added a big hit of almond extract; then after it churned for half an hour, I mixed in a bunch of toasted almonds. 

For the other one, I followed this recipe for cardamom ice cream with warm ginger drizzle. Sounds complicated, but it was really easy. The ice cream is just milk, sugar, cream, and ground cardamom. Then for the drizzle, you heat up a little syrup of white sugar, brown sugar, and water, and then you add the ginger and boil it for a while. I don’t have a microplaner, so I used the small holes on my cheese grater, and ended up with little nubbins of ginger which were actually really nice. 

Both kinds of ice cream turned out great. I wished the ginger drizzle had been thicker, but the taste was fabulous. 

I really enjoyed the cardamom ginger one. I might make it again and boil down the ginger syrup until it’s really thick, and swirl it into the ice cream before freezing it. 

MONDAY
Aldi pizza

My car has gone crackerdog again, and Damien can fix it but the parts are taking forevvver to come, so we’ve been doing a lot of duck-fox-basket of corn maneuvers every day, with the extra added spice of one kid doing a ton of dental appointments before he loses his insurance, and another kid doing a wisdom tooth consult (where we learned that she has one lone third tooth deep down in her gums! Not a baby tooth or an adult tooth or even a mesiodens, but just a little bonus guy. I like to think that, in tooth society, this is the equivalent of a holy fool, which doesn’t have any obvious specific value, but you gotta think it’s there for a reason, so you just make sure you know where it is). Anyway, we had Aldi pizza. 

Also on Monday, I was seized by a sudden urge to clean and reconfigure the refrigerator. I basically switched the vegetables, which were in the bottom drawers, and the condiments, which in theory were in the door but in practice were scattered all over the place, many of them lying on their sides with loose tops, which is the main reason I suddenly got mad and cleaned the fridge. 

So here’s the new sich:

You can see that we have replaced the bottom door shelf with a PVC rod and some screws, but the middle door shelf also recently broke and I haven’t fixed it yet. The bottom drawers have been replaced with plastic tubs, and the bottom shelf has been replaced with a wire closet shelf. I’m proud of my ingenuity but furious at the people who design refrigerators. 

I also moved the eggs to a low-clearance shelf, so people won’t be able to put heavy things on top of them; and I put the packaged meat and the cheese on separate shelves, so people will stop mixing them up (which leads to nobody being able to find anything, and more food waste). 

It’s weird having the veggies on the door, but I am the main person who needs to be able to find and grab them, so it’s a weirdness I can deal with. The things that the rest of the family uses more often are easily accessible. I really think I’ve done it this time! I’ve designed a system so perfect, no one will need to be good. This might actually work, because it’s just a refrigerator. 

Anyway, we got to the oral surgeon. 

TUESDAY
Pork chops with peach butter, mashed ginger acorn squash, risotto

I got pork chops because they were irresistibly cheap, but I really hate cooking pork chops. It’s a mental block. I’m so afraid they’re going to dry out, and I’m gonna serve the fibrous grey mittens that haunted my childhood, I always end up messing them up even if I have a great recipe. Pork ribs are fine; it’s just the chops I have issues with, even if they’re cut thick. 

But Damien took a kid to the appointment that’s like an hour away and I recorded a podcast with A Simple House, which was fun! So I got moving and made a pot of Instant Pot risotto, which everybody likes.

Jump to Recipe

It’s not the same as stovetop risotto, of course, which is magnificent but so much work. But it’s still really good! 

And I fetched an acorn squash from the garden, cut it in half, scooped out the seeds, drizzled it with olive oil and sprinkled it with salt, and roasted it. Then I scooped out the flesh and mashed it, and then I added the leftover ginger syrup, and a little cardamom. 

I am a golden god and it was the best mashed squash I’ve ever had. The chops, I sprinkled with salt and pepper and lightly roasted them and served them with peach butter. 

A very lovely autumnal meal altogether, very mellow fruitfulness. Not a stringy mitten in sight. 

WEDNESDAY
Peach-stuffed waffles

Wednesday Damien had promised to take the kids to a concert in Boston, and Elijah was at work, and that meant that the only people home for dinner were me, Irene, Benny, and Corrie. Waffle time!

I broke out the old Mary Gubser cookbook and made a double batch of waffle batter. 

The kids requested chocolate chip waffles, which is fine with me; but I myself wanted peach. We had a small jar of peach pie filling I never used, so I buttered the waffle iron, put on a thinnish layer of batter, and then spooned some peach filling on that,

and then a little more batter. 

Dang, they were good. 

I was very pleased with myself, and just sat there making more and more waffles until I suddenly remembered I had an article due in the morning. I told the kids they could watch three episodes of something, and went off to write, and then reemerged at 10 PM to discover that they had turned the TV off after three episodes, but I hadn’t said anything about going to bed, so they did not do that. I may have shouted, “WHAT ARE YOU, STUPID?” and they may have shouted “YES.” (You can do this every once in a while, for a treat, especially if you’re all full of waffles. I also tell them they’re smart, just to keep them on their toes.) 

THURSDAY
Chicken orzo soup, rolls

Thursday I finally faced the oyakodon recipe I have been planning to make for weeks. But the truth is, I had a giant turkey breast in the fridge, which I got because it was 99 cents a pound, and which I had defrosted because I don’t remember why. Oyakodon really needs dark meat, but the breast was already thawed, and I honestly couldn’t remember if people even like it, and I didn’t have dashi, and so on. 

BUT, it was a foggy, drizzly day in September, so I made regular old cheater’s soup. I just chunked that whole breast in the Instant Pot with a lot of water, carrots, onion, celery, a little parsley, and some salt and pepper, and pressed the “soup” button. When it was done, I tasted it and hastily added a few tablespoons of chicken bouillon powder. I pulled out the turkey breast and shredded it and put it dumped it back in, added a small box of orzo, and simmered that for a while, and heated up some frozen rolls from Walmart, and man. It was a perfect cozy little meal for a rainy day.

I love orzo in soup. It’s so elegant and comforting at the same time. 

Also, Cub Scouts got cancelled because of the rain, to my vast relief. I really loved signing up for Cub Scouts. This whole “going to meetings” nonsense has to stop, though. 

FRIDAY
Regular Spaghetti 

Regular! Regular! Regular spaghetti, pasta from a box and sauce from a jar. We love it. 

A quick update on the comments situation: I didn’t fix it, but I made it slightly better, so you’re far less likely to get follow-up emails from Russians trying to explain arcane things about ferrous metals, or someone crowing, “your piece is highly educative and wonderful. More power to your elbow!” (If all spam were like this I’d let it go, but most of it is boring and gross.) Anyway, that’s where that stands, and I apologize if your inbox has been haunted because of my site! 

And that’s-a my story. Middle Aged mom out. 

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Cinnamon garlic roast chicken

This is the chicken we usually serve at passover, but of course you can make it any time of year. Faintly sweet and nicely cozy, it's popular with kids and tastes good cold.

Ingredients

  • 4-5 lb whole chicken
  • 2 tsp salt
  • 1 tsp sugar
  • 1/8 tsp ground cloves
  • 1/8 tsp allspice
  • 1/8 tsp nutmeg
  • 1/8 tsp cinnamon
  • 5 cloves garlic, smashed

Instructions

  1. Preheat the oven to 500.

  2. Mix the spices together and rub them all over the outside of the chicken.

  3. Stuff the cavity with the garlic.

  4. Put the chicken breast side down on a rack and roast for 15 minutes.

  5. Reduce heat to 450 and roast for another 15 minutes.

  6. Turn chicken breast side up, baste with pan drippings, reduce heat to 425, and continue cooking for another thirty minutes or until temperature reads 180.

  7. Let chicken stand 20 minutes before carving. Also can be refrigerated and carved later, to be eaten cold.

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Instant Pot Risotto

Almost as good as stovetop risotto, and ten billion times easier. Makes about eight cups. 

Ingredients

  • 1 medium onion, diced
  • 4 cloves garlic, minced or crushed
  • 1 tsp salt
  • 1 tsp ground sage
  • 3 Tbsp olive oil
  • 4 cups rice, raw
  • 6 cups chicken stock
  • 2 cups dry white wine
  • 1/2 cup butter
  • pepper
  • 1.5 cups grated parmesan cheese

Instructions

  1. Turn IP on sautee, add oil, and sautee the onion, garlic, salt, and sage until onions are soft.

  2. Add rice and butter and cook for five minutes or more, stirring constantly, until rice is mostly opaque and butter is melted.

  3. Press "cancel," add the broth and wine, and stir.

  4. Close the top, close valve, set to high pressure for 9 minutes.

  5. Release the pressure and carefully stir in the parmesan cheese and pepper. Add salt if necessary. 

Feeding the poor is Free Parking

If my faith were a Monopoly game, the church food pantry would be the space marked “free parking.” If you need food, you can go and get free food from the church, because it is the church. Simple, easy, free and occasionally massively important.

My family is not, by the mercy of God, in need of the food pantry to feed our family, but I am so glad it exists — for the sake of the people it serves, and for my own sake, every time I can donate.

I keep my involvement simple: When I do my weekly shopping, I pick up a few duplicate items of shelf-stable food — the same foods, and the same brands, that I want for my own family, because if I can afford a few extra cents to get the good kind for myself, then I can afford it for someone who doesn’t get many choices in life.

If I have one of my kids with me, I let them pick something out, so they feel more involved. Then, when we go to Mass the next day, I drop the goods off in one of the collection boxes — or, ideally, I ask one of the kids to drop it off, so they continue having a hands-on familiarity with this basic work of charity.

And that’s it. Simple, important, undemanding and effective. Free parking for Catholics.

But why would someone need a concept like “free parking” in the Church, especially if they aren’t poor and in need of its services? Because God may be simple, but our relationship with his Church can get complicated. So many aspects of our faith can become painful or confusing or fraught, and it may get harder and harder to find any point of connection with God, any spot where we can just keep things simple, and just be.

Maybe we’ve had a bad experience with someone in the parish, and, because we are human, we have a hard time untangling that relationship from our relationship with God. Sometimes it’s our fault and sometimes it’s not, but it’s fairly common to struggle with some unpleasant associations with the very place that is supposed to be our spiritual home, with the very people who are supposed to make up our spiritual family.

But donating to the food pantry is free parking! When we give, we don’t have to deal with anybody, and we don’t have to use any kind of social finesse. Absolutely anybody can plunk a case of mac and cheese into the collection box and then just walk away; and it will always be a necessary and salutary thing to do.

Maybe we’re frustrated or discouraged or mistrustful about finances in our diocese. We take our obligation to contribute to the church seriously, but we also have serious doubts that money is being used well. FOOD PANTRY, FREE PARKING. That little bag of coffee, granola bars and tuna stays right in the neighborhood and feeds someone who wants and needs it. Feeding the hungry will always be one of the least problematic transactions possible.

Maybe we’re having a hard time praying. Maybe our spiritual life is incoherent or angry or just kind of flat right now, and we can’t seem to snap out of it. Maybe we’re not in a state of grace and aren’t yet ready to do what it takes to get back. Where to go?

Food pantry! Free parking! Making a little, easy decision to give to the food pantry each week is a really good way of keeping that connection to God open when we’re not necessarily feeling it otherwise.

Good works are not a substitute for prayer. There was a whole Reformation about that. But…. Read the rest of my latest for Our Sunday Visitor. 

 

What’s for supper? Vol. 395: Agrodolce

In haste! In haste! For this has been the week of countless appointments (well, seven: doctor, pediatrician, ob/gyn, neurologist, and three dentist) but only one car, plus Cub Scouts, and the school just called to say that one child forgot her lunch. I thinks she’s just gonna have to develop a sudden liking for school pizza. 

But still, happy Friday! Friday is Friday. Here is what we had this week:

SATURDAY
Chicken wraps and chips

This is a meal that started out decent and has slowly devolved, and I think this is about as low as it can go before it turns into absolute bachelor chow. The first iteration was delicious crunchy saucy buffalo chicken tenders, shredded lettuce, blue cheese, and ranch dressing. Then I started getting non-buffalo chicken tenders, which are cheaper, and adding the buffalo sauce, and skipping the blue cheese because not everybody likes it. This time, I got those awful frozen “chicken fries,” sloshed on some ranch dressing, and then didn’t realize the buffalo sauce didn’t have a little hole, and got a buffalo flood. 

It was honestly still pretty good, and I’m only pretending I’ll do better in the future. It’s hard when your kids don’t like hot dogs. What are you supposed to do on weekends? Nobody knows. Thow some scallions on there. 

SUNDAY
Ragu on pasta, zucchini agrodolce, bread, salad; cheesecake with peaches

Sunday, Clara and her boyfriend came over, so we did make a nice meal. I made zucchini agrodolce (= “sour sweet”) following this recipe from Sip and Feast. It’s a leetle bit time consuming, but so worth it; and it’s good cold, and great the second day, so you can make it ahead of time. 

You make a little sauce with red wine vinegar, water, sugar, red pepper flakes, chopped garlic and sliced red onions. Then you fry up the zucchini pieces in olive oil and sprinkle them with kosher salt

and then you mix it together, cool, and chill. Wish I had fried them a little browner, but oh well. 

Delicious. I’m not a huge zucchini fan, but I love this dish. You should make it before summer weather is over, because it’s a really great side.

Damien made his amazing ragù using the recipe from Deadspin. He used ground veal and pork, and it was savory and scrumptious as always. 

We had a little miscommunication vis-à-vis bread, and I bought some, Damien bought some, and Clara brought some from her new job, which is at a bakery. 

FINALLY ONE OF MY KIDS WORKS AT A BAKERY. 

Lovely meal. (We also had a green salad, but I don’t think anyone ate it.) She also brought a bunch of bialys, which I haven’t had a bialy in probably thirty years. So nice. 

For dessert, we had cheesecake, which I actually started on Friday, kinda. 

So, the cheesecake! This is not a fluffy, airy cake; it is a rich, creamy, heavy extravagance. This is a proprietary recipe which I am not at liberty to disclose, and I understand why, because this cheesecake is a truly spectacular beast, and may not be safe to unleash on the general public. But I can give you some of the tips that were shared with me. 

-First is that you put your ingredients out the night before you bake them. So in my case, I put them out Friday night, baked it Saturday night, and we ate it Sunday night. 

-Do not over-beat the ingredients, because that will introduce air in. 
But do scrape the bowl out a few times, including the bottom, as you mix it; or else you can pick it up on and drop it on the counter a few times after adding ingredients, to knock out any air. 

-Wrap the pan in two layers of heavy duty foil and bake it in a water bath. Keeping the oven humid will reduce the chance of cracking.

-When it’s done baking, turn the oven off and leave the cheesecake in there until the oven is cool. Don’t peek; temperature changes cause cracks. Then wrap it in plastic wrap and refrigerate it overnight (I leave it in the springform pan overnight).

I was exceedingly frazzled and distracted, so I made some errors, but behold: One little crack (and a few moon craters). Not bad. Last time I made this recipe, I over-baked it, but this time it turned out nice and pale and even. (This is a matter of taste; some people prefer a darker little skin on top.)

Sumbitch held up really well when I took the sides off the pan. 

I wanted a peach topping, and I am down to frozen peaches now. Here is where I wish I had take the extra time to put in a little lemon juice or something to preserve the color when I was processing a million fresh peaches; but I didn’t, so we had darker peaches that were honestly a little bit mushy, because I left too much moisture in the bag and froze each batch in one clump, rather than chilling the pieces individually before freezing them longer term. 

I more or less followed this recipe (just the peach topping part), which calls for pieces of peaches and also peach puree. I think maybe I made it the night before, so it could chill. Turned out quite good. It is not quite as thick as pie filling, but thicker than — well, a lot of things I make when I think I don’t need a recipe. 

All in all, I was pretty proud of this whole project. It wasn’t too sweet, but full of flavor, and the texture was, frankly, immaculate. 

Turns out Clara’s boyfriend doesn’t like cheesecake, though! It’s okay, we like him anyway. He brought us some cedar scraps, and I’m seriously thinking of taking up wood carving this winter. Maybe make some picture frames, or weird little ornaments that nobody wants. 

MONDAY
Bruschetta with leftover ragu

Monday I knew we were gonna have leftover ragù, so I cut up a few baguettes, drizzled them with olive oil, and sprinkled them with salt, and toasted them in the oven. I heated up the ragù and set out the leftover cheese, and it was delightful. 

Long live ragu!

I think Monday was the day my car started making horrible scronching noises.

TUESDAY
Roast chicken and baked potatoes

Monday night I got sick with awful vertigo, nausea, headache, and muscle pain, and I could barely get out of bed on Tuesday, which sucked. Damien did everything, including taking kids to appointments and roasting a chicken and baking some potatoes. I was too sick to eat, but it smelled good. I believe he roasted the chicken with olive oil, salt, pepper, and garlic powder, and a couple of lemon halves stuffed in there. 

WEDNESDAY
Grilled ham and cheese, veg and dip

Wednesday I was up again and decided we all needed many more vegetables in our life, so I made a giant tray

and then I made a bunch of grilled ham and cheese sandwiches. I usually use sourdough bread, but the store was out, so I did ciabatta rolls, which I think I prefer. I like knowing exactly where the sandwich ends. I used provolone, and put a little skim of mayo on the outside and fried them in butter

and them put them in a warm oven for ten minutes to make sure the cheese was all melted. I was absolutely starving by dinner time, so this tasted like an olympian feast. 

Frickin ham and cheese, can’t beat it sometimes. Especially with pickles.

THURSDAY
Mexican beef bowl 

Last week, top round roast was on sale, so I bought an extra for this week. Cut it thin and marinated it for several hours in this tasty little marinade

Jump to Recipe

I made a big pot of rice in the Instant Pot and quickly cooked the meat in a pan on the stove. 

Sometimes I go all out with a million toppings for these rice bowls, but this time we just had the rice and meat, some corn and cilantro, sour cream, and corn chips. I think I also put out shredded cheese. Oh, and lime wedges.

A very fine meal. 

I always spoon some of the juice from the meat over the rice, and it’s so good. This is a meal you can prep ahead of time and then throw together in fifteen minutes right before dinner time (well, if you have an IP or rice cooker). As I mentioned in my meal planning post, this kind of meal strikes the right balance between effort and convenience, for me. I almost always have more time and energy in the morning, so I do as much as I can then, and then supper is quick and easy, but doesn’t feel crappy.  

FRIDAY
Salmon tacos with guacamole

I have some frozen salmon fillets that were super cheap at Aldi, and I sure wish someone would come over my house and cook them, but that seems unlikely. Probably I will just pan fry them with maybe some Tajin or whatever. I have some avocados, but I don’t know what state they’re in (I mean existentially, not geographically), so we’ll see if the guacamole materializes or not. I forgot to buy cabbage. I do have more cilantro and some salsa and sour cream.

People’s expectations are pretty low, and I feel a little bit like I have been put in a bowl and dropped repeatedly, to get all the air bubbles out, but not in the fun way. It’s just been an exhausting and discouraging week, and I’m not even the one has to go lie down in the driveway and look at . . . warped rotor drums, or whatever it is. I am simply too delicate for that sort of thing, and instead practice the womanly art of frying things in mayonnaise. 

P.S. If you are my editor and are reading this, I am working on the things. I have been, and I am. I’m gonna sprinkle some cilantro on top and it will be great. 

P.P.S. Damien brought in the forgotten lunch, because he’s a much nicer mom than I am. 

P.P.P.S. Yes, it finally occurred to me that we might actually have covid. We do mask in medical settings, and the kids mask at work, so there’s that. Welp. Tomorrow will be kinder. 

Agrodolce, indeed. 

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Beef marinade for fajita bowls

enough for 6-7 lbs of beef

Ingredients

  • 1 cup lime juice
  • 1/3 cup Worcestershire sauce
  • 1/2 cup olive oil
  • 1 head garlic, crushed
  • 2 Tbsp cumin
  • 2 Tbsp chili powder
  • 1 Tbsp paprika
  • 2 tsp hot pepper flakes
  • 1 Tbsp salt
  • 2 tsp pepper
  • 1 bunch cilantro, chopped

Instructions

  1. Mix all ingredients together.

  2. Pour over beef, sliced or unsliced, and marinate several hours. If the meat is sliced, pan fry. If not, cook in a 350 oven, uncovered, for about 40 minutes. I cook the meat in all the marinade and then use the excess as gravy.